Time To Turn The Page- Move On With Our Lives. Stop Looking At The Past.

We have all been wounded, scarred, hurt, let down, hopeless, helpless, broke, lonely, tired, weary, scared, depressed and the list can go on. That is part of life as we know it. Today I felt like I should post an encouraging but truthful nugget for anyone who is down right now for any reason. Listen- there is a time to weep, a time to mourn, a time to be sad and a time to review the past so you can learn from it. However 90% of people who go through this normal process in life get hung up on one or two areas, and it becomes an anchor, locking them into the emotional bondage of past events, or mistakes. The result of this is an endless circle of pity, shame, hopelessness, and lack of motivation. What if I told you that starting today, you are ordered to turn your head to the future. No looking back. Make a decision to be happy. Make a decision to forgive anyone who has ever accused, abused or used you. Turn the page and be free of the past, be emptied of the heavy weight you have been carrying…
How do you do this? It is a matter of discovering a few keys that not many people understand. I will share a few with you to help you stand up, brush yourself off, and move forward.

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People come and go, jobs come and go, health comes and goes, feelings come and go, and money comes and goes. People come and go out of your life all the. here is the first key to moving forward NEVER PUT YOUR SECURITY IN ANY OF THOSE THINGS. You are simply waiting for a fall if you do. Its going to happen. So, if you believe in God, I would recommend putting ALL of your security in Him, and who you are in Christ. He said He will NEVER leave or forsake us, and unlike the things I mentioned above, He is the same yesterday, tomorrow and forever. That is security! All those other things are fine to have in life, but as ” gravy ” if you will. You will find that if you focus on the relationship with Him, all those other things get put in right perspective and you will not obsess over any of them.

Next, TURN THE PAGE on the past. Have you ever tried to walk forward while looking backward? I recommend you try it once. You cannot do it. Neither can you dwell on the past and move forward in your life. Never stumble on something behind you. How do you do this? You wake up one day and make the decision that you are now looking forward. The things you say, the thoughts you allow in and the actions you take MUST be helping you to move forward. Negativity has no place in moving forward. Today, is the first day of the rest of your life!

Lastly, Put yourself around those who you want to be like. Stay away form, and cut ties to anyone is a pity party lover. Bad news, and will try to keep you down so they do not have to make any effort to move forward. Misery LOVES company. Go find some people you admire, people with peace, and joy. You will become what you put yourself around. READ MY TEXT! YOU WILL BECOME WHAT YOU PUT YOURSELF AROUND! Choose carefully who you hang with, and what things you do. If you want a good snapshot of what you look like now in your life, just take a look at your circle of friends. That IS you. If you do not like what you see, then pull the trigger and make new connections.

I realize this a very brief post for such a deep topic, but I promise you if you will do those simple things right now, your life will change for the better very soon. Money back guarantee! Do not stay in bondage to the past. If you need help working through some things then seek out someone to talk to who will keep you on track. You are going to be what you say you will be. So choose words carefully and speak out loud the things you are looking forward to accomplishing. Positive speak brings positive results, negative talk brings negative results. By the way, I did mention God in this post, so if you were offended, you can cross that line out and insert ” palm tree” or ” the universe” or whatever it is you call God.
Listen, I am available by consultation to help anyone through this transition into a happy existence. You don’t need to spend thousands of dollars on doctors to get this done. I am trained in social work and have helped thousands of people over a hump in their life.

TJ

Hurt Much? Love Much? The Two Are Related…

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The Cycle Needs To Be Broken By Someone….How about you? Whether You are the ” Hurter ” or the ” Hurtee ” It Is Time To Quit.

Loved People Love People- Hurt People Hurt People.

We All Have Labels. Some Self-Diagnosed And Some Given To Us. The Question Is Which Are Valid? This Should Help You Decide..

Even as I write this post I think of my youthful years, and how very important it was to be approved by others in what I said, did, even how I dressed. Amazing the effort I put in, but looking back, I did not get much in return. I may be the only one who did that….hahahaha! I suspect we all at some time have done this. As a matter of fact, I think we still do it as adults.

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Of course there are codes of dress and hygiene and speech that sort of go without saying, literally. I am referring to the other stuff. The fact that adults panic before going into a big meeting, or giving a big presentation. Those of us who get nervous when trying to express how we feel about something, fearful we might offend someone. Why?

More than not,  believe it has to do with insecurity and the absence of confidence in ourselves. It causes people panic attacks, difficulty speaking, awkward body language, and a myriad of other problems. I think we would all agree that we each have areas that make us a bit more anxious than usual. That in and of itself is just part of who we are, however when it becomes burdensome, it needs to be addressed. I know some may be thinking they have a “disorder” and they cannot help it. In some cases, it could be a real medical issue, but in many it is an issue that can be traced back to someone or something. Rather than try to explain why we do what we do, I will give 2 examples of how this can happen.

1- The “ham bone” story;

A young woman and her mother are preparing the Easter ham and as the mother cuts the bone off of the ham, the daughter asks ” why do you cut the bone off?” A little taken back, the mother responds calmly with ” well honey, that is just how we do it”. As they continue on, the mother quietly picks up the phone and calls her mother, and asks her why they cut the bone off of the ham, as the young daughter listens eagerly. Mother hangs up the phone a minute later when the daughter asks what the response was. Mother says ” Oh darling, she says we have always done it this way” so they start on the green beans. Finally the young daughter says “Mom, lets call great granny and ask her!”…reluctantly mom agrees and calls her great-grandmother and asks the same question. She hangs up the phone, waits for the question from her daughter which is already coming, and says this; ” Your great great grandmother said she does not know what we are doing it for, she just did it because back 50 years ago they did not have a pan big enough to hold the bone!”

2- When I was an administrator at a school for teenagers who had been expelled from public school, I ran across one 17-year-old who was extremely loud, threatening and violent. When I pulled him into my office and calmly asked him why he acted like that, he quickly named off a few ” anger disorders” he had been diagnosed with. Hmm, I thought…he has been sold a bill of goods that he has no control over his anger. So I did the smart, rational thing and gave him the keys to my truck. I asked him to go wait in the truck until I got there in a minute, and we would talk more as I ran a few errands. Of course he looked at me like I was nuts, but it was a moment of truth and I had to take it. A few minutes later we went to a large department store, a library, and a fast food chain. He followed quietly behind me, careful to adjust his behavior according to the setting we were in. (hint, hint).

When we arrived back at the school, I asked him one question – ” Hey, just curious why you did not knock out the check out guy at the store, or yell at anyone in the library, or even cuss a few times when someone bumped into you at the burger joint?”

He looked up, looked around, silent for a minute, then threw this at me; “Mr P., I cannot do that in those places, I will get in trouble!” About a minute later a smile came across his face, and he said ” so this school is like one of those places, right?” I smiled and said “Exactly”.

He was an honor student who rose to the top of the promotion program faster than any other student. He was able to realize that labels are not always correct. He controlled his anger, it was just his choice where he did it!

I learned very much about labeling and the harmful effects it can have on the average kid who has been repeatedly told they have this or that problem. They begin to believe it and act it out. By the way, this is a certain group, not everyone. I am aware that medical issues do actually interfere with behavior sometimes! Hope you learned as much as I did about why we do what we do!

 

Have You Something To Celebrate? A New Book? A Published Article? How About Just Good News In Your Family Or Career? Illness Healed? We Want To Share It! Let Us Know!

We all get so caught up in all the negativity in what is going on in today’s world that we thought a monthly post highlighting some really good things would be cool. You can just use your first name unless you are alright with the publicity. It can be something you are thankful for like finding a job after a long absence, a healing of a sickness that has been plaguing you or your family.

 

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If you have good news form the writing world, like a book published, or an article published, or any milestone no matter how big or small. We have spent a year complaining so why not continue this thanksgiving spirit throughout the year?

Here is all you do. Drop me an email at tim@dontlabelmykid.com  and put ” Good News” in the subject line. Then give a brief summary of what happened that you are excited about and thankful for . If you want to keep your name a secret just use initials and if you would like the publicity just use your entire name and any other details you want included!

Its free and fun! We all need a reversal of mindset sometimes, share with us what has happened to you and we will post it!

TJ

Call To Order Meeting For Those Supporting Sharia Law …

 

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I feel great willy!
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Meeting Called To Order…
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Where I come from – If a wife is disrespectful she loses an arm.

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This stuff helps me think…

What Role Do Grandparents Play In The Raising Of A Child? Guest Post!

Guest Post by Jane Sandwood-

 

The Essential Role of Grandparents and Child’s Upbringing

Anthropologist Margaret Mead once stated that the connection between family generations is essential for strong mental health and stability of a nation. In today’s culture of multi-carer and single-parent homes, having involved grandparents will go a long way to help fill in the void for children. According to research from the Generations United Organization, studies claim that children living with their grandparents have greater benefits in mental health, socialization, financial stability, and overall health than the general population.  If you ask any adult to recall a fond memory from their childhood, chances are most of them will include their grandparents. For children, this special bond with their grandparent gives them comfort and strength that sticks with them far into adulthood.

Guidance in Parenting


Grandparents are the backbone and support of the entire family. In fact, about 7.8 million children in the United States alone live in households supported by grandparents. When both parents work full-time jobs, the grandparents are usually the ones who devote their time and energy towards the care of their grandchildren.

Benefits the Entire Family

According to research from Boston College, studies found that emotionally close ties between grandparents and adult grandchildren reduce symptoms of depression in both groups. Children who have a strong bond with their grandparents reveal to have a sense of emotional closeness and social support. A strong relationship will effectively model a healthy relationship and reduce the negative effects of their surroundings.

Source of Wisdom

As the elders, grandparents are the most experienced in raising children. However, most parents are unwilling to ask for help when they need it the most. Parents must look to grandparents in helping decide on major decisions and investments for their children and the entire family.

Child’s Playmates

Grandparents tend to have more patience and time on their hands, which allows them to become the child’s playmates. In many families, grandparents often watch their grandchildren when parents work or visit during the weekends. This allows parents to have someone they can rely on to talk about parenting and trust to watch their children when necessary.

There is no doubt that grandparents play a strong role in the mental health and upbringing of their grandchildren. The wealth of knowledge grandparents possess and the experiences they share cannot be found anywhere else. It is through them that children instill traditions, gain additional support and create values within the family.

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An Example Of Why We Are Giving Away Americas Control All Due To The Loss Of An Election..

The Definition Of Desensitization

 

I have paid close attention to every accusation, attack, and attempt at bringing the Trump train down since the election started. I am here to remind everyone that almost every attempt at doing so has failed, resulting in even more idiotic accusations which so far have been proven false and ended with yet another tempter tantrum with an even wilder attack on Trump and anyone on the right in general. However in order to truly put an end to these ridiculous attempts at changing Americas mind, we must understand the method behind the madness.

In this case I am sharing Glamour magazines new pick for ” woman of the year”.

https://www.glamour.com/story/women-of-the-year-2017-solange-knowles

To date it has probably one of the top 5 of the most bold and crazy effort at a subject called “Desensitization”.  Please pay close attention to this word as it relates directly to this matter.

I am going to give you the meaning of two words that I believe are the foundation for where we are in our battle against sharia law, and abuse of women in general that happens each day more and more. Here they are;

1 Projection- In psychology, projection is defined as; “a theory in which humans defend themselves against their own unconscious impulses or qualities ( both positive and negative) by denying their existence in themselves while attributing them to others

2- Desensitization-In psychology desensitization is defined as ; ” the diminished responsiveness to a negative , aversive or positive stimulus after repeated exposure to it”

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One of the behaviors we have seen consistently from the losing team here is temper tantrums. If you are a parent you know all about these.

Fine if you wont let me play I am taking my ball and going home.”

Now there are many options on how to play a losing hand. One is to just make it a mission to talk bad about the winner and if a chance to trip them up comes your way, you will take it even though the shows already over, just because a sore loser. However if the key players are not just sore losers, but more on the anti-social side – this is now the beginning of a war in the mind’s of the losing team.

This looks more like ” Fine if you wont let me play I am taking my ball and going home” with a part two ” And I am going to take you down however I have to no matter  what the voters said. You better watch your back Jack”.

Now you have constant personal attacks and efforts to downgrade the winner so you feel better about yourself. In this method, wild and absolutely crazy accusations are made on the winning party. This is not about expecting to convince everyone that what you’re saying today is true, because it’s usually too crazy. These attempts at personal lives, or a book on why the loss took place are designed to establish and continue to keep that little door open in the minds of the people and take whatever collateral damage you can get while reloading with another campaign to follow. If they cannot reverse the entire group at once they at least are launching their effort to desensitize….which as you recall means to minimize a horrible situation and make people more accepting by shouting from housetops, ( or CNN, The Washington Post, etc).

This is where America ( except the Trump train) has and is really dropping the ball. We are now allowing things to take place legally here that most would never have even discussed 10 years ago because it’s so ridiculous. While this is softening the hearts of people who just vote like robots and don’t think about right and wrong we also have that other word projection kicking in.

Remember this is when someone who is committing hideous behavior actually succeeds in numbing people by accusing the other side, the winning team of doing the very thing they themselves are guilty of. Now these are going on stronger than even today by people like Hillary and like the link you can read at the top of this page where Glamour magazine named a rabid supporter of sharia law and sings its praises as this years ” woman of the year “. Yes its true. The cutting off of limbs for woman who disrespect their men and the murder of others like the one I posted before this who wore western clothes so was hacked to death by her loving husband.

Why am I telling you this? Because this is a huge part of where we are dropping the ball. We are a desensitized nation. We have let some major players in some dangerous games who have all the leg room they want.   I am trusting that the pattern will continue, that Trump will continue to be untouched by even some of the nastiest attacks.

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Every now and again Trump will take an opportunity to rub the salt in the wound, but hey if that’s the worst he does, he is excelling…

tj

 

Its The Weekend! Time For Some Priests To Reach Out To The Community! You Get The Idea. Always Looking To Mentor A Child When They Get A Day Off From The Wrecktory…

These guys are tireless. Even when they get off from their wrecktory for a day, here you are, seeing them out in the community trying to have a hand in really changing a young persons life..Volunteering for weekend playground monitors, helping with potty training in malls, and some even volunteer to watch the young kids while momma and daddy get to shop for a few hours. Those kids will never be the same just because of the giving hearts and hands of the ministry..

Can you imagine where those kids might be today had they not had the opportunities afforded them compliments of some of the Priesthoods finest?

II should be clear that according to the Catholic Churches own Bishop accountability log, only around 30k priests are even under investigation…so its clearly just a few bad apples, right?

http://www.bishop-accountability.org/

We Never Ask For Money Here- Except Today- Just Read it Please.

Support This Evangelist In India- Hes Doing Alone What Many Would Not Attempt Here. When you click on the link below you will be taken directly to their website and photo galleries of all they have done to minister. You may want to turn the volume down when you first open the site because it starts with many former Hindus and others praising the Lord with no doubt they mean it! You will see a Pay Pal button on the site so do what you can. Remember if only 10% of us gave just 5$ that is 500$ and enough for this Christmas.

Help The Hungry In India Through Pastor Dileep

Here is his link above . This is actually Evangelist Dileep who started this little Christ filled church just 4 years ago by himself, now he is 27 I believe and has 75 new believers/ Now I tell you how he went from 15 to 75 with very little and how we all can help a ton by giving just a little..God blessed him a new beautiful wife just months ago as well!

 
Its time For Dileep in India to ask for donations so his small church surrounded by Hindu churches can do what they do – minister each Christmas by getting enough money raised give rice and beans to all the Hindus who have no food. By this simple act of reaching out his church has grown from 15 to 75 many of whom are former Hindus who could not ignore the Gospel being demonstrated right in their own homes by this very outreach.

It is unreal how many they can feed rice and beans to for a small amount. For example if only 10% of my readers gave 5$ each, they would have enough to serve rice and beans to all the surrounding homes this Christmas.

Folks we are talking 500$ total to do that much ministry. Please go to the little website Dileep has set up and there is now a pay pal button you can give right directly to them. They appreciate help to do this as this is their Christmas present to them. They love serving and even in the pastors day job the money goes mostly to get Bibles and food for their own church.

Giving to them is like stretching every penny 10 different ways as it is so inexpensive ( to us) to support them.

hijministries.webs.com

Please lets take a few bucks and let them feed more people.

Tj

PTSD- How It Effects Soldiers As Bad Or Worse As Civilians…And A Great Story To See It In Movie Form.

By now everyone has heard of PTSD or Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Although a long time back it was a term reserved for the diagnosis of very severe patients who had been exposed to some extraordinary events. These days 6 years old get the diagnosis when a spanking they got has been labeled abuse and therefore they suffer from PTSD.

Today I watched a movie with Samuel Jackson and a few others that were all in combat together in Iraq. Unlike the war movies I have seen, this was one of the best mental health sides of the truth that I ever have seen. In this flick, it does not end when the 4 who were from the same area leave for home. It does not end until you see how each one chooses to handle their PTSD here at home, in the real world. If  you are a coach or counselor of any type you need to watch this movie.

I think it will change even the most seasoned therapists, as this movie is so absolutely transparent in each of the people’s lives it brings life in you a whole new meaning to what PTSD is really all about.

 

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Home Of The Brave

If have any trouble getting on through the first link, I have posted a second to Tubitv ( 100% free to watch it there)

https://tubitv.com/movies/389507/home_of_the_brave

https://tubitv.com/home

 

 

Get Me Out Of My PTSD!

 

 Storms Of Life- The Hurt And Healing. Where Did God Go? How To Be A Rock In The Midst Of The Thing That Is Ripping Others Apart…

This world can be harsh. Our circumstances can attempt to break us down. Whether you are a Christian or not, I am wrting this to offer to you the only way to remain unshakeable from any of life’s flaming arrows. Will we not feel pain or sorrow and never cry if we do what this article tells you? We still feel the pain, and cry sometimes.

Its our core, our spirit that can remain steady and strong.

If you are a Christian wondering why you feel so vulnerable when things seem to fall apart or you are a straight up anti-God soldier who claims not to need God, this is for both of you. For the Christian, you can learn about why you may be weak in your faith when bad things happen. For the soldier, drop your weapon for a few minutes and see if you might see how this could work and hopefully give it a shot.

Whether we are talking about some tragic circumstances in our own families like unexpected death or loss of income or a number of possible issues, we all have felt at one time or another that God surely must be punishing us. Unbelievers sometimes use these circumstances to affirm their non-belief in God.

Recently we have had some large-scale disasters like the wildfires in California and hurricanes in Florida that forced over a million people out of their homes, not knowing what they may return to. On a personal note I have been through wildfires, dozens of hurricanes and other natural disasters. I lost my brother to suicide and my grandparents the next year. My family has seen a bunch of personal tragedies and natural ones like these storms and fires I referenced.

 

This year though was the first time I have ever evacuated.  When hurricane Irma took over the entire state of Florida, everywhere you turned you saw people crying or pleading with God to take the storm away. You know what? That’s okay. The problems arise when believers don’t get the requested answer in the time frame they have allowed God to wipe these things out. No question people are genuinely hurting, scared. helpless and sometimes hopeless when these things happen.

The question to believers in Christ, is which way are we going to trust now. In our own understanding or in God, period? Here is the mandate from God’s Word;

Trust in the Lord with all thine heart,  lean not on thine own understanding. In all our ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct thy paths”. Proverbs 3: 5-6 ( KJV)

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Now, before anyone gets irritated by this order from God because it does not seem possible at certain times, let me introduce a missing ingredient in being able to trust.

Faith

How do we acquire that kind of strong faith though? It surely does not come from reciting ” I have faith” all day hoping faith will enter into you. Faith does not come by mind over matter or manipulating your self into a false sense of faith.

Once again if we refer back to our life manual, the Bible, we are told that there is but one way for genuine faith to arise in us. Faith that will sustain us through anything.

Romans 10:17 says “So then faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the word of God. ( KJV)

Wait just a minute you may say” I have read countless Christian books, I pray, I try to do all I can to please God, I even leave tracts for my waiter or waitress  I should have strong Faith!

Good for you for choosing Christian books over romance novels or inappropriate magazines. Those are wise choices but don’t for a minute they give you lasting faith. You see- God never changed the rules about how legitimate faith is gained, it’s still by His Word. Yep, that means no other Christian anything has the power to do that. Now do not mistake me as if I was saying we don’t need Christian magazines, books, videos and all because we do. They can encourage us, keep us focused in the right direction, even provide us with an emotional spiritual high for a day or two. They keep us in touch with other believers which is a recomendation the apostle Paul made.

However, don’t mistake emotions for faith. So why am I emphasizing the true way to get real faith? Because lack of real faith is the number one reason people stay in crisis mode when problems come, walk away from the faith or never get involved. Maybe they have never been told what we are talking about. Whatever the reason they are drifting and doubting is because they do not renew their minds daily with the Word of God, the Holy scriptures.

What is the difference between you fueling  up only on Christian books and movies which can produce an emotional charge or maybe a temporary ” Jesus high” ? It’s the difference between real faith and manufactured powerless temporary faith. Lets see what the Bible says about what the power its own words hold for those who stay in it and keep renewing their minds everyday from it.

The word says this about itself-

“For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow: it judges the thoughts and attitude of the heart”-  Hebrews 4: 12 ( NIV)

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I challenge you to find any Christian publication other than the Bible that makes that claim about its contents. You wont. Not even the most famous Christian authors would even consider comparing their words to the power of ” the Word”.

I dedicate so much time to the Word of God and its importance in the midst of crisis and storms in our lives because those who obey the order on how to get real faith are the ones who really remain unshaken regarding God no matter what is going on. One other thing to note, is that in the bible you will find that every true follower of God had to come to crossroads at some point in life where they surrendered their own will and plans and decided to put it all into trusting God. Take Job for example. An honest, faithful man who God clearly allowed to suffer in almost every way he could. Lost his fortune, his family, even his health.

Job was frustrated and not happy about his situation but he decided nothing was going to take his faith away. He made the decision right up front to operate not on feelings, but Faith. So after the storms in his life, his life was put back together by God even greater than it originally was. Now that is faith. In today’s mindset you will likely not find too many Job’s in your life. Most people just get mad, give up, curse God, denounce God or even take their own lives because they decided to play the role of God and decide how things would end up. What was so different about JOb? Was he a better person than we are? Maybe God gave Him some superpowers that we dont have? Nope.

Only one thing kept Job so trusting in God that even when his own wife said he should curse God and die, Job said ” Even though He slay me, I will praise Him”

There is another scripture that Christians need to keep in mind as well. Romans 8:28 says ” All things work together for good for those that love the Lord and are called according to His purpose”

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Job understood God was not going to just abandon him. That’s why the man who makes our little problems look insignificant was unshakable in his faith. That faith to keep on and even have total peace is only found one way. Reading the word of God often to renew your mind ( if you have not figured this out yet, the world we live in does everything it can to talk us out of our faith.)

The only protection from being affected by that is to renew your mind before you walk out the door and face the world that wants you to walk away from God. That is part of the armor God has given us to be unshakable when everything seems to be working directly against you and your family and faith. He will not force us to stay in His word though. We have free will. If you go to Barnes and Noble and choose to cozy up with a good Anton Lavey ( church of satan) book, that’s your call and of course so are the consequences. So our choices in crisis are critical.

If you have grown children or even younger children you surely have noticed that in their first few years of life they never question what you say or do. If you hand them a bottle, they don’t spin the top off to inspect what you’re giving them. It could be poison but their childlike faith does not even tempt them to go against you or question you about any major decisions. If told your young kids they need to hit the basement now because a tornado was coming through, its doubtful they would pull out a weather radio to challenge your statement. That describes childlike faith.

Guess what that Bible says about what kind of faith is pleasing to God? You got it- childlike faith. Just like your kids never questioned you as a child, we are to have the same attitude with our heavenly Father. Once again, you cannot order childlike faith online or talk yourself into it. Faith comes from where again? The Word. Period.

As adults as we find discipline to renew our minds in the Word and experience true trust in God no matter what is happening, your friends, family, kids are witness to that peace you have unlike so many. That is the opportunity to share your secret with them, and they will believe you because sometimes you are the only calm one around and they notice it. The mindset we get from reading the truth all the time and building real faith goes a little like this-

People come and go ( death, divorce). jobs come and go, health comes and goes, riches come and go, friends come and go, but God- He is the same yesterday, today and forever. That is what you will have etched in your soul as you stay in the Word. It leaves very little room for trusting in any of those listed things. But your realization that God will never leave or forsake you and is always the same will provide you with an entirely new kind of faith in any circumstance.

It doesnt matter if you are an atheist today or a lifelong Christian who even ushers in the church. The Word of God is available to both. One is no better then the other but by their trust in Christ. We all need a savior. Not one of us is righteouss enough to land in heaven except by the finished work of Christ at Calvary and by the blood He shed for anyone who accepts His forgiveness. Nobody has a one up one the other. If you are an atheist now, but tonite you choose to invite Christ into your heart and ask for forgiveness, assuming you get in the Word right away faithfully you could be alot better off then a Christian of 20 years who chooses to keep his Max Lucado reads up to date but not too much time in the Word.

That is why this article is for everyone. No matter what your past has been or where you have been. Its all able to be washed away with that blood of Christ for the asking.

You know when I began writing this article, I considered adding some pictures of the massive storms and fires that are happening. Then I got my head straight and realized I was about to give glory and even more attention to the things that are tearing people apart. Thankfully I realized that this is a hope centered piece, not a piece for lots of people to glorify the bad things that hit us.

Thats why the emphasis has been on the awesome opportunity to overcome this world and its attempts at defeating us. What we need is more instruction on how to overcome this world according to God. Thats victory. When you choose that route you will find that the things that used to wear and tear you down are now like flys on your shoulder that you can swat off and keep moving forward in God’s Word and plan for you and yours!

Listen to this womans confidence. I guarantee it did not come to her by never missing Oprah.

Whatever your storm, whether tragedy in your family, fires in your woods, or crazy rain and winds over the entire state, they all get smaller and smaller as the Word grows bigger and bigger in you!

Test it and see. After all God said not a word of His will ever return void…

TJ

 

 

 

 

Storms Of Life- The Hurt And Healing. Where Did God Go? How To Be A Rock In The Midst Of The Thing That Is Ripping Others Apart…

This world can be harsh. Our circumstances can attempt to break us down. Whether you are a Christian or not, I am wrting this to offer to you the only way to remain unshakeable from any of life’s flaming arrows. Will we not feel pain or sorrow and never cry if we do what this article tells you? We still feel the pain, and cry sometimes.

Its our core, our spirit that can remain steady and strong.

If you are a Christian wondering why you feel so vulnerable when things seem to fall apart or you are a straight up anti-God soldier who claims not to need God, this is for both of you. For the Christian, you can learn about why you may be weak in your faith when bad things happen. For the soldier, drop your weapon for a few minutes and see if you might see how this could work and hopefully give it a shot.

Whether we are talking about some tragic circumstances in our own families like unexpected death or loss of income or a number of possible issues, we all have felt at one time or another that God surely must be punishing us. Unbelievers sometimes use these circumstances to affirm their non-belief in God.

Recently we have had some large-scale disasters like the wildfires in California and hurricanes in Florida that forced over a million people out of their homes, not knowing what they may return to. On a personal note I have been through wildfires, dozens of hurricanes and other natural disasters. I lost my brother to suicide and my grandparents the next year. My family has seen a bunch of personal tragedies and natural ones like these storms and fires I referenced.

 

This year though was the first time I have ever evacuated.  When hurricane Irma took over the entire state of Florida, everywhere you turned you saw people crying or pleading with God to take the storm away. You know what? That’s okay. The problems arise when believers don’t get the requested answer in the time frame they have allowed God to wipe these things out. No question people are genuinely hurting, scared. helpless and sometimes hopeless when these things happen.

The question to believers in Christ, is which way are we going to trust now. In our own understanding or in God, period? Here is the mandate from God’s Word;

Trust in the Lord with all thine heart,  lean not on thine own understanding. In all our ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct thy paths”. Proverbs 3: 5-6 ( KJV)

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Now, before anyone gets irritated by this order from God because it does not seem possible at certain times, let me introduce a missing ingredient in being able to trust.

Faith

How do we acquire that kind of strong faith though? It surely does not come from reciting ” I have faith” all day hoping faith will enter into you. Faith does not come by mind over matter or manipulating your self into a false sense of faith.

Once again if we refer back to our life manual, the Bible, we are told that there is but one way for genuine faith to arise in us. Faith that will sustain us through anything.

Romans 10:17 says “So then faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the word of God. ( KJV)

Wait just a minute you may say” I have read countless Christian books, I pray, I try to do all I can to please God, I even leave tracts for my waiter or waitress  I should have strong Faith!

Good for you for choosing Christian books over romance novels or inappropriate magazines. Those are wise choices but don’t for a minute they give you lasting faith. You see- God never changed the rules about how legitimate faith is gained, it’s still by His Word. Yep, that means no other Christian anything has the power to do that. Now do not mistake me as if I was saying we don’t need Christian magazines, books, videos and all because we do. They can encourage us, keep us focused in the right direction, even provide us with an emotional spiritual high for a day or two. They keep us in touch with other believers which is a recomendation the apostle Paul made.

However, don’t mistake emotions for faith. So why am I emphasizing the true way to get real faith? Because lack of real faith is the number one reason people stay in crisis mode when problems come, walk away from the faith or never get involved. Maybe they have never been told what we are talking about. Whatever the reason they are drifting and doubting is because they do not renew their minds daily with the Word of God, the Holy scriptures.

What is the difference between you fueling  up only on Christian books and movies which can produce an emotional charge or maybe a temporary ” Jesus high” ? It’s the difference between real faith and manufactured powerless temporary faith. Lets see what the Bible says about what the power its own words hold for those who stay in it and keep renewing their minds everyday from it.

The word says this about itself-

“For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow: it judges the thoughts and attitude of the heart”-  Hebrews 4: 12 ( NIV)

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I challenge you to find any Christian publication other than the Bible that makes that claim about its contents. You wont. Not even the most famous Christian authors would even consider comparing their words to the power of ” the Word”.

I dedicate so much time to the Word of God and its importance in the midst of crisis and storms in our lives because those who obey the order on how to get real faith are the ones who really remain unshaken regarding God no matter what is going on. One other thing to note, is that in the bible you will find that every true follower of God had to come to crossroads at some point in life where they surrendered their own will and plans and decided to put it all into trusting God. Take Job for example. An honest, faithful man who God clearly allowed to suffer in almost every way he could. Lost his fortune, his family, even his health.

Job was frustrated and not happy about his situation but he decided nothing was going to take his faith away. He made the decision right up front to operate not on feelings, but Faith. So after the storms in his life, his life was put back together by God even greater than it originally was. Now that is faith. In today’s mindset you will likely not find too many Job’s in your life. Most people just get mad, give up, curse God, denounce God or even take their own lives because they decided to play the role of God and decide how things would end up. What was so different about JOb? Was he a better person than we are? Maybe God gave Him some superpowers that we dont have? Nope.

Only one thing kept Job so trusting in God that even when his own wife said he should curse God and die, Job said ” Even though He slay me, I will praise Him”

There is another scripture that Christians need to keep in mind as well. Romans 8:28 says ” All things work together for good for those that love the Lord and are called according to His purpose”

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Job understood God was not going to just abandon him. That’s why the man who makes our little problems look insignificant was unshakable in his faith. That faith to keep on and even have total peace is only found one way. Reading the word of God often to renew your mind ( if you have not figured this out yet, the world we live in does everything it can to talk us out of our faith.)

The only protection from being affected by that is to renew your mind before you walk out the door and face the world that wants you to walk away from God. That is part of the armor God has given us to be unshakable when everything seems to be working directly against you and your family and faith. He will not force us to stay in His word though. We have free will. If you go to Barnes and Noble and choose to cozy up with a good Anton Lavey ( church of satan) book, that’s your call and of course so are the consequences. So our choices in crisis are critical.

If you have grown children or even younger children you surely have noticed that in their first few years of life they never question what you say or do. If you hand them a bottle, they don’t spin the top off to inspect what you’re giving them. It could be poison but their childlike faith does not even tempt them to go against you or question you about any major decisions. If told your young kids they need to hit the basement now because a tornado was coming through, its doubtful they would pull out a weather radio to challenge your statement. That describes childlike faith.

Guess what that Bible says about what kind of faith is pleasing to God? You got it- childlike faith. Just like your kids never questioned you as a child, we are to have the same attitude with our heavenly Father. Once again, you cannot order childlike faith online or talk yourself into it. Faith comes from where again? The Word. Period.

As adults as we find discipline to renew our minds in the Word and experience true trust in God no matter what is happening, your friends, family, kids are witness to that peace you have unlike so many. That is the opportunity to share your secret with them, and they will believe you because sometimes you are the only calm one around and they notice it. The mindset we get from reading the truth all the time and building real faith goes a little like this-

People come and go ( death, divorce). jobs come and go, health comes and goes, riches come and go, friends come and go, but God- He is the same yesterday, today and forever. That is what you will have etched in your soul as you stay in the Word. It leaves very little room for trusting in any of those listed things. But your realization that God will never leave or forsake you and is always the same will provide you with an entirely new kind of faith in any circumstance.

It doesnt matter if you are an atheist today or a lifelong Christian who even ushers in the church. The Word of God is available to both. One is no better then the other but by their trust in Christ. We all need a savior. Not one of us is righteouss enough to land in heaven except by the finished work of Christ at Calvary and by the blood He shed for anyone who accepts His forgiveness. Nobody has a one up one the other. If you are an atheist now, but tonite you choose to invite Christ into your heart and ask for forgiveness, assuming you get in the Word right away faithfully you could be alot better off then a Christian of 20 years who chooses to keep his Max Lucado reads up to date but not too much time in the Word.

That is why this article is for everyone. No matter what your past has been or where you have been. Its all able to be washed away with that blood of Christ for the asking.

You know when I began writing this article, I considered adding some pictures of the massive storms and fires that are happening. Then I got my head straight and realized I was about to give glory and even more attention to the things that are tearing people apart. Thankfully I realized that this is a hope centered piece, not a piece for lots of people to glorify the bad things that hit us.

Thats why the emphasis has been on the awesome opportunity to overcome this world and its attempts at defeating us. What we need is more instruction on how to overcome this world according to God. Thats victory. When you choose that route you will find that the things that used to wear and tear you down are now like flys on your shoulder that you can swat off and keep moving forward in God’s Word and plan for you and yours!

Listen to this womans confidence. I guarantee it did not come to her by never missing Oprah. 

Whatever your storm, whether tragedy in your family, fires in your woods, or crazy rain and winds over the entire state, they all get smaller and smaller as the Word grows bigger and bigger in you!

Test it and see. After all God said not a word of His will ever return void…

TJ

 

 

 

 

So Whats It Going To Be? Therapy Or Coaching? Do You Even Know The Difference? You Should.

Sometimes I like to incorporate humor into my posts to keep the site from just being about depression and addiction and PTSD etc… I just cannot be all too funny with this. This is a topic that is DEADLY. I remember, because my brothers suicide wont seem to get out of my mind some days. So I am going to ask everyone to stop and read this, and you know what it may not even apply to you. But it could prevent what happened with my family. I cannot undo the gunshot that ended my brothers life. But I can share my 20 years of experience in mental health and addictions, from a personal, and then a professional standpoint. I sure hope you will send this to anyone that seems like they may be one step away from tragedy. If it is you. I tell you what to do at the end. Anyhow, I hope you take this to heart. Anyone who follows me knows how much I love you all and just want to keep getting the word out that you cannot delay treatment for mental health without terrible consequences. But let me say this, there is some really good news on here about the success we are having worldwide in a new area to help….tj

 

Time to Evaluate Clock Review or Assessment Management
The words Time to Evaluate on an ornate white clock, counting down to the moment a manager will perform an evaluation, review, assessment or reevaluation of a worker, property or process

Is Therapy Going To Drive Me To Suicide?

Most people in and around the mental health field as a client or provider are familiar with these two terms. The question is, what is the difference? Its a valid question that deserves an honest answer.

So your deciding how to address the situation your going through and the options. Whether it be a depression issue, a divorce issue or any other circumstance that has proved itself to be interfering in your routine to the point that you need at least some action. Lets face it, there are thousands of different providers who all claim to offer up the most successful, healing, lasting and least restrictive and intrusive on your life.

Where do you start? A friend’s recommendation? An ad that catches your eye or ear? The most well known methods? Its a tough call for anyone. It does not have to be. You see just as we have progressed in other industries like automobiles, and appliances and homes, the same applies when it is time for mental health choices. We don’t screw bolts into the sides of peoples heads anymore to see the effect. We don’t torture people hoping to alter behavior or feelings. Things have improved. Much progress has been made in these areas and you will do yourself a disservice by not following up on what is working and what is not.

Just because you are struggling with an issue in your life does not paralyze your ability to educate yourself. Of course you must be strong enough to make your own decisions and choices on treatment unless you are in need of inpatient care. This post is about outpatient care. If you follow along you just may see clearly some things that have been unclear until now. I have had extensive experience in both coaching and therapy, both as a client, and eventually as a professional for 20 years. To try and break down all the theories of personality and modalities of treatment would take an entire book. In my opinion it is not necessary.

Everyone has their opinion about what works best and many of the ideas have validity and can indeed help. However do you want to get 45% help when another method would bump that up to 85%? Of course not. Let me add that I have no dog in the hunt. Our team together has decades of experience in just about every major modality used in outpatient therapy. If you want to come lay on a couch each week while we remind each other how miserable your life has been, someone will take your money. But what about outcomes? After all the whole point of therapy is to get better and move on with your life, right?

What if medication is recommended? We all know that game right? Try this for 6 weeks, if it does not make you feel good we will change to the next, and the next and so on. You may be caught up in a weekly sit down regurgitating old dark memories for a year before any medications start working. That is , if they ever work, since even major drug makers have admitted that 5 or 6 of their latest anti-depressants actually cause suicidal thoughts.

OOPS! Yeah, it does happen and it is not uncommon.

But even so, therapy is just so much more ” professional ” sounding. It must be the best if its been around so long. I mean this coaching thing is fairly new. Why take chances on that when you can enjoy the benefits listed above of a therapeutic model?

Maybe because coaching works.

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Lets take a closer look at this whole coaching model. The coaching models at least that I am familiar with takes the therapy model and turns it on its head. It rejects everything traditional long term therapy stands for.

Coaching focuses on what is right in your life. What you can do well. What strengths we have. A return to normalcy as soon as possible in the least restrictive environment is key. On the other hand have we all not at one time or another seen a post or article that begins with  ” I have been seeing my therapist now for 5 years  ” or  ‘ My therapist says he thinks I need a higher dose of medication”. If you have not, you need not leave WordPress because they are everywhere.

Try finding one that says they have had their coach for more than a few months. It will be tough. The reason being is coaches create independence for you by emphasizing what you can do and have done well, whereas a typical therapy session will hover around how many failures or let downs occurred and how did you deal with them. If not monitored closely therapy can simply become something you must depend on and have or you will crack. It also can make for real strong job security for the provider. I am in no way saying that this is always the case, I am simply pointing out the facts.

 

Let me give you another example that may be easier to illustrate. AA & NA have been absolutely famous and known to be the savior for millions who swear they cant make it without it. There is good reason for that. Part of the mantra you must repeat and repeat and repeat until its drilled in your head is that you are powerless over your addiction.  Sounds like pure healthy honesty right? We need to face the truth, right? The problem here folks is that most AA & NA programs have a tough time breaking into double digits as far as success in remaining sober for 12 months. Hmm. Sounds like AA & NA need the addicts more than the addicts need it.

Now I can already here people yelling at me reciting the serenity prayer and how the program has kept you clean for 5 years. If that is true, good for you and stick with it. The problem is we have this other 90% who fail and fail and fail. This group is just as important as the 10% who are doing well. right? The program or therapeutic modality cannot replace the addiction. Trading one addiction for another is , well not the goal.

Lets quickly review. Coaching is a process where someone trained in the area your needing comes along side of you and helps you identify your strengths, address any negative patterns that are interfering with your life and resets your thinking and goals to align with your abilities. This process in general is a much shorter and effective one that rarely disturbs your daily routine and acts more as a cheerleader to help you up and out of a rut then a tape recorder that plays your most hideous memories over and over until one week you think you have it beat- but then at your therapy session your forced to drag it back out of the dark corner of your head.

Coaching is not becoming dependent in any way on someone else. Therapy can lead to a total dependency on a person to survive, and even worse create a stigma that you are lesser of a person because you cannot live life normally or without the handicap of a label, diagnoses, or medication.

Am I saying that therapy is a waste and coaching is the only way to get help? Of course not. What I absolutely am saying is that one better be educated on their true need lest they become involved in a very dependent situation that may strip you of self esteem when that method is not needed. I have been a therapist. I have been a coach which is what I am more involved in then formal therapy. There will always be times when someone is in need of long term clinical therapy. What I have learned however is that everyone deserves the chance to be helped up and out of a rut through short term coaching before the much more restrictive clinical environment.

Besides the the stigma, the dependency, and the long term visits in the therapy model, you also need to understand that the difference financially between the two are radical and you are talking tens of thousands of dollars for any long term clinical therapy and that is besides medications. Why would you put yourself or anyone you love in that box before you give them a chance to be coached back to health? So far I have given you my personal and career experience, but in case your wondering, the established and very well run coaching programs that are in existence now are running circles around any treatment centers for addictions and over 20 other issues from domestic violence to PTSD. As a matter of fact many insurance companies wont even pay for therapy anymore. That is right, they pulled out and are happy to pour their efforts into legit coaching programs. Why would they, when the success rates on coaching is 75% and up and traditional treatment centers around 20%? Not to mention coaching is 1/3 the cost if not more to you and to insurers.

I want to close with a very important point. This article is designed to offer new options and hope to those who may not be familiar with coaching model. Any good therapist or doctor will tell you the truth about whether long term expensive therapy is needed or if coaching is what will work best for the client. I wont lie to you, just like any industry, not every provider is truthful and many will keep you or your child locked up and medicated as long as the payer will pay. Authorities are trying to crack down on those who use clients for personal gain but with tens of thousands of programs, it is very hard.

Take a few minutes and enjoy a laugh. The Old School Psychiatrists Were Just a little more upfront and honest with their patients then in today’s world- Would it not be nice if all Doctors were this up front! Today she would likely here ” Maam, you have OCD, your in denial, you are paranoid and I think these 3 prescriptions may help….We can all learn a thing or two from this Bob Newhart clip…

I have worked with and still do some of the finest clinical therapists around and they are excellent. Doctors as well and in no way am I saying nobody needs clinical therapy. What I am doing here is giving you all a little heads up about what is coming down the pipe. Coaching has proven itself, its cost effective, and is the latest and greatest alternative to what we had to live with. You will hear about it if you have not. All the Don’t Label My Kid! Team members are coaches and you can check out our areas of expertise on the home page menu. Read a quick bio of what we each do and reach out to us if you think you need help. We always work with people and have yet to turn anyone away.

This is a post I would not have written even two years ago. However the coaching success, and opportunities for those who have been coached to actually become working coaches after they find success makes this a win win for anyone and everyone. Don’t put it off anymore. No matter what the age, race, background, or need- believe me we have been there and done it. Just look at our bios and you will understand. If you are doing great, and your kids are doing great. but you have this friend from church, neighbor, or relative that is hurting- be the one to help them get help. You never know what people may be just one more step away from and the tragedy of ignoring it can do.

When my brother shot himself after we just watched some television together, I sure wish I would have asked him why he was so quiet for 2 hours. But, I did not. Instead he walked out the door and shot himself in the head. Don’t let that happen to anyone you know. Contact us immediately for prompt response.

Write these contacts down. Print this out. Share with a friend. Share with your followers. We cannot help unless you get in touch. At the bottom is a personal cell number that is available to call 24/7- 365. If you are in trouble now, or know who is , you may call it anytime.

Otherwise for a consult about a family plan, or individual need and 100% confidential, email one of these – leave a contact number in the subject if you wish to be called back

dontlabelmykid2@gmail.com or tim@dontlabelmykid.com

Emergency Crisis Line- 386-675-7549

TJ

 

Memo To Those Still Not Getting The Military Ban On Transgender..Psst! It’s Not About Hate- It’s About Safety.

 

Trump Is Oh Such A Hater For Banning A Group On The Edge..

(Article Above)

No matter left or right, liberal or conservative there are some things that you just assume all thinking people would be able to figure out on their own. I never thought I would have to write a post on why transgender cannot serve in the military. I have to take the time today and write it off as being  ” overlooked and needing explanation ” and so that is what I am going to do. Lay out some facts surrounding this situation in general that if you do not know, you have no business commenting against the decision to ban transgender from the military. This is not my opinion but facts that anyone can verify and which common sense should then validate.

I promise in this short time to make it so easy and clear to understand it that not even Obama could lie his way out of it. So simple that the very reverend Al Sharpton could not race bait his way out …( now I have to think of a white person so I am not a racist) .

..and so well explained that even Bill Clinton could not spin it.

The link at the top is another hate post about Trump and his hatred towards transgenders. It is just a typical ” he is such a bigot ” rant with no evidence of any thinking behind the post. I intend to make a few things very clear for you all.

 Fact– let me remind you that nobody, whether transgender or Bi-Polar is allowed to serve in the military. If you have a psychological or psychiatric disorder, you are not able, period. For some reason that I have not researched, why transgender people were given a ” pass ” on this in the first place when they fall into the same category as all others with a mental health related disorder.

Transgender people are diagnosed with Gender Dysphoria in the DSMV. Recently the name of the disorder was switched from GIDGender Identity Disorder to GDGender Dysphoria. The definitions of the two names have remained almost identical.

So if I stopped writing now, you should have enough information to understand why they cannot serve. However for the sake of leaving no doubts, lets include some facts that we don’t hear about much. If you are just now being told about the additional facts, hopefully it will put an end to any more speculation about where exactly people with GD should be spending their time and effort.

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Celebrities and Hollywood are very quick to speak out about things they have no clue about. As a matter of fact they get paid to do it! That’s why they are called ” actors “. Also, as you may know the media is generally anti-Trump to begin with. So the campaign trail was an absolute up road battle from the get go with Hillary owning the liberal media. Lots of lies and half-truths spread.

To give you an example of how much they contradict themselves in general, listen to this recent event. During the presidential campaign, there were a few famous actors and television personalities that threatened a few things would occur if Trump was elected. One thing was that about 20 were going to take the first flight out of the country because they could not stand the idea of living under Trump. None of them ever left. 

Another threat was the total shutdown of Hollywood, from grips to producers, actors to stage managers. In the press during both of these events was none other than Brad Pitt.

Mr. Pitt absolutely took the position that the very best of this country – Hollywood would up and leave and we would all be at a great loss and regret electing Trump.

Things have an amazing way of turning around. Just a month ago Mr Pitt broke the news to the media that Hollywood and its directors and producers and almost all others were running the biggest pedophile rings in the world and that for 30 years in the field he had seen nothing but people in the industry using child actors for their own sexual toys. He went into great detail and even said the illuminatti and Hollywood together controlled the worlds pedophile rings. He had absolutely nothing but horrible things to say about the same people he threatened to runaway with!

I bet he is glad now he didn’t leave the country with a few thousand pedophiles. He must have thought of what could happen in a situation where he is so greatly out numbered…yeah..

So you have to take the media with a grain of salt.

 Above I clarified in a paragraph why legally transgenders are not permitted in the military. Now let’s look at a few other facts and see if when we finish you still will push for the rights to serve in the military.

If I told you the president had just signed an order allowing anyone who was only ” mildly impaired” on drugs or alcohol to serve in the military and be involved in combat would you support it?

Mildly impaired would mean for example when driving a car that a person would have a 25% risk of accident simply because they are mildly impaired. 25% of this group will, without a doubt be in some sort of wreck.

Would you support the President allowing this group in the military? As a matter of fact do you think that being around endless supplies of ammo and automatic weapons is a good match for that mildly impaired person?

 I’m going to assume most of you say that you are against that due to safety . So let’s take a look at how transgenders rate in the area of being ” impaired ” in that sense by their own behavior.

Were you aware that only 49% of transgender people will live out their full life? That’s right because 61% will commit suicide. No matter why or how they do it, the fact is, 61% will kill themselves. My first question after telling you this is

How good of an idea would it be for the USA to place those people around an endless supply of ammo and guns every single day? Also if you knew that a person that was serving with you in the military had made a conscious decision to increase his own chances of dying sooner by altering a circumstance in his life which was not mandatory, how confident would you feel with them as your sole cover in a gun battle?

Now lets add to the mix that a family member, maybe a son or daughter was in the same military group as that person and had daily contact . Perhaps even they relied on one another for combat backup if need be. 

Would you be committed to backing their rights to serve with your son or daughter in the military? If you would then let me ask you this.

Lets say I was guidance counselor at your child’s high school.  We were discussing colleges, I strongly encouraged and even pushed the child to go to a certain school that would offer lots more scholarship money, sports that he likes, and even a possible sports full ride scholarship. None of the others have any of this . None of the other schools can even compare to what they offer, and its even in your home state!

*Oh there is one little downside. Unlike the other colleges with a less than 3% student suicide rate, the child would have classes each day with some individuals who we know can get a little suicidal or homicidal, but we are pretty sure only 61% will actually kill themselves , and don’t know that any else would be injured . So in all truth, 41% of the child’s classmates will likely live long enough to graduate just like everyone else!

 But as a courtesy I did want to let you know about the slightly higher rates of violence and death. Other than that its …to die for.
Now if as a parent you are alright sending your child into an environment where not maybe, but for a fact 61%  of a certain group of classmates were suicidal or homicidal, and they would all at take at minimum their own life at some point in time, then there is nothing I could say to you to change your mind on transgenders in the military. You are whats called a ” high risk taker”.

Other than offer to pray a prayer of protection each day over your child, my hands are tied.


    Excuses

I did hear the argument once that the 61% suicide rate was inflated because most suicides are due to stigma or being made fun of, and not being transgender.

Here was and still is my response to that ;

Whether 61% of transgenders check out due to stigma, shame, someone else’s fault , or straight up conviction of sin one thing is for sure. 61% of transgenders check out early. Dead is dead.

With that thought in mind my friends, answer this question..

Would you encourage a loved one into a situation where they had only a 49% chance of survival? On purpose? Someone you care about. Fight to get them in a place where they had only a 49% chance of survival? Of course not you say?

Maybe if your brain would be malfunctioning, right?


Surprise!

That is what you are doing every time you ” fight for the rights ” of a LGBT group. You may as well look them in the eye and tell them your mission and efforts will put them in the grave much sooner.

…But they will die with rights. If that is what is so important.

 

                          TJ

 

 

 

The Tongue Has The Power of Life And Death in It…Are You A Murderer?

Have you ever met someone who just had a special talent for absolutely tearing people apart with their mouth? The vitriol spewed out like the lava from a volcano, just hot and hurtful as they could be?

You will remember them many years after because the wounds from those attacks don’t heal real quickly. The verbal exchanges almost always include a piece of very personal information that you willingly shared with them and now they are using your own trust against you by bringing it back up.

There are two reasons people get that mad, in that fashion and are oblivious and apathetic towards others, and here they are.

1- They have been very hurt themselves ..

2 – They have been very hurt themselves..

Why People Are So Mean

“Hurt people hurt people, and loved people love people.”- unknown

This is so true and applies to just about every situation involving the words we say. It would not matter so much if  words themselves were not so powerful.

I can think of 5-6 scripture verses off the top of my head about the power our tongue has.  We are not warned that wrong words may cause a little irritation, or make someone frown. Nope.

We are told  in no uncertain terms that this is life and death. The ability to completely destroy another’s self-confidence and break their will down..words are dangerous and you can see by the image in this post what God has to say about those who don’t control their tongues. The outlook is not too bright.

I was a hideous killer of people’s hearts when I was a teen. I remember saying things to people when I was angry and noticed the effect my comments were having on others. I was more shocked and confused then anything, after all this was common dinner table talk with my dad around. It meant absolutely nothing to me and i considered others weak. It was not until I was in my 20’s that I believe God showed me the big picture. I think He had mercy on me because up until then these unbelievable words I was spewing out meant nothing to me.

The important part is that as a result of my learning the truth about how my words got where they were, I had to pass by the places and things that I had so much built up anger about and start acknowledging them so I could work through my own healing. Otherwise not much would change. Remember the saying ” Hurt people Hurt people and loved people love people” If we remain in a state of a hurt heart, our words are not likely to change. That is where the grace of God and His healing of memories comes in.

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Hopefully statements like the one above wont be so common out of our mouths anymore. Whether you are the hurt one spewing out comments that tear people up inside, or you have been on the receiving end of the negativity, take action. Pray for the person who is hurting you but don’t put yourself in front of them too much until things change. If its unavoidable such as a spouse, then its time to come clean whichever side you are on and make some changes.

Are you a hurt person or a loved person? You measure that by your fruit. The words that come from your lips.

TJ