Please share this link or post with anyone you may know in Florida who needs support!
Please share this link or post with anyone you may know in Florida who needs support!
Every once in awhile we all get to feeling like we have it just a little tougher than the rest. Then you get hit between the eyes with what longsuffering and a hard life is REALLY like…I promise as you follow the true trials one family has had with a daughter who has up to 30 violent seizures. Oh yeah- that is 30 per DAY.
Each step of the journey from infant to adulthood and current status is chronicled and will make most of us drop to our knees and ask for forgiveness for complaining how we have it…
In addition and even more important this story is absolutely essential reading for anyone who has relatives with Epilepsy or seizures and the like. You won’t hear complaining as mom tells about endless horrendous violent seizures and hundreds of attempts to find any medical help/
The amazing thing about this story to me is something you or I may find hard to believe. But this is how the family is…
Anissa, now near 50, and still in need of 100% total care all day every day which is still done by her 80 year old mother was born perfectly healthy. Yep. At six months a doctor gave her an overdose of a medication that turned a beautiful blond baby girl into a vegetable for life.
She forgave the doctor and never pursued legal recourse- And somehow maintained her strong Christian faith in the midst of such a traumatic event .
This is something you have to see to believe…click the blue link above and see what life can really be like.
Read the body of this post before watching the clip.
Above is the link to the 8:56 minute video that is offensive. I feel the information in it is worth overlooking the time of total crude language. I hope you do too.
Wow. I never imagined I would air a clip of an atheist bi-sexual arguing with black people who are still playing the victim about things like slavery and other issues. This guy is straight up rude, arrogant, offensive and much more. He curses more in here then I have had on this blog in 5 years combined. Yet I cannot pass up the opportunity to let the whole world see and hear the truths that are laid out, albeit in an extremely offensive manner. However if an argument or debate that reveals truth so we can move on requires 8 minutes of offensive language I think its worth it.
I am warning you to have your young kids in another room, and if you are one of those people like a few in my old church who runs as fast as they can if anyone says “shit” because they are too ” Godly ‘ then don’t bother. You will have to do what I did, and overlook the offensive and see the amazing truths that are in the midst of them.
Watch at your own risk. One more warning, this is an 8 minute video of an arrogant atheist arguing with a few angry black people about sensitive issues. If you cannot handle that then skip it.
One Last Note- This video ends at around 8:56 or so. I advise you to have your hand on the control by 8 minutes. It only gets worse after this debate. I also will tell you that you may see ads and things that are as inappropriate as this guy. Ignore them and get your 8 minutes of truth. If it bothers you so much that he is rude, pray for him.
Visualize Whirled Peas
Its been five years for me with this blogging thing. I have read my share of articles and opinions on why certain blogs have more followers than others, or one has more comments than the other etc… I have been on the same side, looking at my stats and wondering how come mine are so different from other blogs. I have felt the same feeling of questioning myself and wondering what I should be doing that I was not. The truth is, I have learned and still am learning about things that can benefit my site or draw a certain crowd. So this is a legitimate concern.
However, after five years of this, I recently discovered something that has absolutely changed the way I view my site and truthfully every site! I have made a discovery that, at least for me, is brand new and not talked about much, if it is even well understood. I am not convinced that what I am about to suggest, which potentially affects all of your blogs as well, is even common knowledge in the blogging world. I stumbled on it while pressing in over and over, looking for things I may be missing out on to promote my site.
What I am about to say has the potential to be quite controversial. but I firmly believe nobody will be able to disprove my theory. If everyone who reads this takes what I am saying and weighs it with their own circumstances, I am convinced the end results will be very much in line with each other. Now I want to be honest about the fact that some of my findings were birthed out of my total frustration with my lack of growth during certain seasons and seeming inability to move as fast as some other bloggers.
I really went over and over many times the same old information until one day it just clicked in my head that I had part of the answer to why some blogs are so very much more successful growth wise than others. Not that they are any better or worse, but just a reason that finally made sense to me. The news I am presenting here can make each one of us stop and reconsider what our passion is! What we write about. Why we write about what we do. I even remember one day I wrote a post that I had spent much time researching, and expected it to be well received in my community of bloggers. However, to my dismay, it was just an “average” post in my book. You know, 10-20 likes and maybe a comment or two. Whoopee, right?
Something happened around that same time, though, that brought it all full circle for me. That something was my stumbling upon a blog post on the feed about training dogs to do house tricks and healthy eating habits for your mutt. But then, as I neared the end of the post, I saw this enormous number that appeared on the last line of the post where comments also go. Yeah, it was this number like 469 or something. I must have read that 3 times just to be sure but it sure was 469 people gave their props for the doggy master and doggy diet expert. Now, in all fairness, I was just coming off of a post that I spent several hours researching, an hour and a half writing ( I think I may have even edited that one!) and I was feeling a tad low with my 20 likes on a very important topic for all of us humans, but even lower when I caught the 469 for the doggy dynasty.
Here is what I realized then. People in general simply do not wish to deal with the hard stuff that life has dealt. People in general like to have their ears caressed when reading a blog post. They do not want to be confronted with all the harsh realities we are facing in real world, non-doggy life. Grown ups who are well-educated and should care about certain issues like human trafficking, or pedophile priests, or crooked politicians are more than willing and even likely to skip the post about a crisis we, as a society, has to deal with and instead steer their eyes towards soothing material. Its true!
This is not just what my team writes about or what we deal with in mental health, child abuse, and addiction, but it was my own blog that awakened me to the idea of what was happening. I supported my theory by checking with other bloggers and looking at all the different numbers and it proved to be a working theory.
Here is the main point of what I found. People like me, who tend to deal with sad, even troubling issues much of the times seem to have this common thread of a lower amount of followers and not as many takers in general who even want to face these issues much less spend time thinking through them in a blog post. That seems to be a fact across the board. However, the amazing thing I discovered was that my smaller group of people were participating in, liking, and commenting on about 35% of what we published. Now I don’t know if you ever check those stats but recently I read an article by a very successful blogger who I believe said he sometimes had a 1-5% participation rate when it came to his huge audience actually liking or commenting on his topics. So to see 35% consistently and look back over the years and see it never dropped below 20%, was amazing to me. It told me something that we all need to be aware of. The numbers may not line up on the same side with all bloggers in the same categories. But the numbers are there most times just distributed in different places. In my case, I realized I had a slightly more intense crowd who did not mind getting their hands dirty in some controversy. Therefore, what I was not seeing in overall total followers, I was making up 10 fold in active engagement with my posts.
So, for all of us who blog, we need to start making sure our perspective is accurate. It simply is not likely, on any given day, that a human being with all the problems we already have, would rather spend 20 minutes ingesting some bad news about abused kids, rather than totally avoiding it and thinking about the fact that Rover can roll over. The one is simply much more stressful than the other. So none of us should discount one bit of our efforts writing based on simple numbers alone, but on the whole picture.
Many, many times I have read posts written by bloggers who are very disappointed in how slow their blog has progressed, in comparison to some others. Now it is easy for me to see that most are likely missing out on some part of the value in their work because they follow the popular way of measurement which typically is “How many followers you got?” That usually leads to depression. What if, just for one day, the question went like this, “Hey, what percent of the viewers of your posts actually care enough about them to “like” them or comment?” A much different way of thinking is born. And I am willing to bet that the question could be asked in many more ways that I have not even thought of.
But we as bloggers are followers in that sense. We want what the writer over there has. Yet truly we have no idea, unless he makes us privy to his stats, just how important those 26,000 followers were this month, because he never bothers to look past that and dig into the statistics that WordPress provides. Such as, how many of those people even took time to click “like” out of 26,000? Remember, this is not an “either or” scenario. I am discussing meaning that one type of stat is more important than another. Heck, do you think if tomorrow I found out a way to add-on 5000 followers to my crew, that I would not be running to do it? Of course I would. I want that, too.
We need to stop trying to fit our blogs into ‘cookie cutter’ molds that all line up a certain way. I will close by sharing something that happened my second year of blogging. It was a lonely time. I think I was paying family members 5 bucks to comment on a post just to get some action…lol – it was awfully depressing for me. And then I got an email from a lady out of this country. She was suicidal and an addict who had decided to take her life and truly also believed God was waiting to escort her to hell for being an addict in the first place. Rough, rough situation. Even with 20 years under my belt in social work and counseling, i could not prepare for that. Fortunately I did not have to come up with any miraculous words from my therapy book. You see after she told me in the email, from another country, she had decided to take her life, there was a “but”..”
She said “But then I read your post on faith and addiction and how you were where I was and how God never left you and you made it out, so I decided to keep on trying.” I think it was her and maybe a friend I had asked to read that post on that day. I only had a few dozen followers or a 100 whatever. Not many reading much of anything. But I will tell you that after that night, I knew that if nobody ever read one word of my writing again in history, those two years of dark and slow blog growth were well worth all of it and then some.
Never, ever question how your work, your efforts, are paying dividends. Hey, the facts are, folks, that some people get paid in the form of thousands of new followers pouring into their site each month, or maybe constant re-blogs and praise on almost everything they put on paper. It could be something they are not even aware of like in my situation with the suicidal lady. Be assured that what you are doing is not in vain. The cards have a way of landing a different way all the time and we do not always get to see how. If we are fortunate, we get a glimpse at some point. Even if you do not, never ever stop putting on paper what your heart is screaming to your brain all the time. There is a reason.
Stay with your first love. Don’t worry about the next guy. I can tell you from experience that you may never know the value of your work on this earth. But from experience let me also be the one to tell you it matters, to someone. Sometimes it matters a whole lot!
I don’t often have the time to listen to many podcasts, but when I started listening to this Christian Prophetic podcast by Doug Addison, I could not stop. It speaks to me on many issues in my life and questions I have had this last year, and I am positive it will for you too. If you are going through a ” where is God ” time, or suffering from addictions and sickness, this is for you.
If you just need a boost in your faith, and encouragement this is for you. Take time to listen to it while you are working on a post or something, but don’t miss it!
Once in awhile, I see something like this my complaint hole goes empty. If this guy can do that, what is holding me back from my dreams? And you? It’s guys like these that reset my mind about how rough I have it sometimes..
Recently I wrote about the life of Billy Graham. I wrote about why I thought the whole world loved him. There was so much to say it was hard to make the post as short as I did. Before he died someone asked him what He would say to the Lord when He first saw Him. He said ” I would ask why me? Why did you choose an uneducated farm boy from North Carolina to minister the Gospel around the world?”
As I think now of the life of Stephen Hawking, I see just the opposite type of man who Graham was. I believe I know why God chose Billy Graham for the job. He was humble, and obedient. He was not rebellious against God, just curious. Hawking spewed so much vitriol about God and why ” we don’t need to invoke a god because science explains everything.” With all of his worldly wisdom and his IQ, he could not scrape together any common sense. He discovered but a tiny, tiny little part of how God created this universe and then attributed it to nothing. A big bang in the sky. To me, its was if was saying that my truck got here by just oozing out of the ground over millions of years. His ranting sounded that stupid.
It’s hard for me to believe how much faith that man must have had. He had more faith than I do. His faith was in ideas that something came from nothing. The fact that the earth is positioned so if we moved a centimeter to either side, earth would burn up or freeze up, to Hawing did not require intelligent design. But had enough faith in a ” big explosion” that put all of us in place. For Real??
The interesting thing about him as that in the last few decades, some of the discoveries made by scientists have made the Bible so 100% accurate that it is science trying to catch up with the bible these days. Many atheist scientists like Josh McDowell and others got so sick of hearing the name of Jesus, that went on a mission to disprove the bible. Like McDowell, when they saw that they were failing to be able to do it, gave up and surrendered to God, and now he has been used in mighty ways by God.
To think that we can answer more than God is pure pride. The bible says that pride comes before a fall. The Bible also says ” The fool hath said in his heart there is no God”.(Psalm 14:1 ) It also talks about how God will harden the hearts of those who continue to reject Him. Scary thought.
When I heard of Graham passing the first thing I thought is how pleased God must be with the obedience he showed throughout his many decades of ministry. When Stephen Hawking died, I had a very sick feeling in my gut and I cannot explain it fully but it was not joy. It is even more sad that he raised his own children to reject God. If you are a parent, can you imagine purposely leading your kids down a path to complete separation from God for eternity? I cannot imagine.
So that’s about all I have to say on Stephen hawking. I wish I could add that he had a death-bed conversation, but I don’t believe that occurred.
Attention please to all of our followers and visitors. This is a guest post I wrote for a brand new blog out called – His Excellent Grace – here on WordPress.
It is a blog about people’s personal encounters with God’s grace and events that occurred in their life where they feel God intervened in their circumstances in miraculous way. I am asking you all to check it out and follow the link at the end of this post to get there. You need not be a Christian to want to read about the incidents that take place and are documented, no more than you must be a cop to watch Cops!
So whether atheist, agnostic, tree worship person or what, everyone will enjoy reading about these different times in people’s lives when they believe God intervened with His grace. I am Tj at Don’t Label My Kid! and this is my personal story of one time I felt that God had intervened on my behalf. And by the way, anyone of you who would like to share a short post about God’s grace in your life is invited to fill out the contact sheet with your attached testimony!
Like most, I have been the recipient many times over of God’s excellent grace and I will share an example here today. Grace comes in all shapes and sizes and I have experienced much of both. This story is about my sons, Micah and Jesse. I was divorced when my two boys were young, so we did the weekend thing and they stayed at their mothers during the week. The divorce, as most do, took a huge toll on all involved, the boys were feeling in the middle and struggling with the whole thing.
I was a strong Christian at the time, but I daily worried that due to some of my own struggles that they would not have interest in “My Jesus”.
My boys were not exactly seeing me “walk the walk” all the time, and even though we were in church almost every Sunday, and I knew the word of God, I still was modeling behaviors that confused them and I was worried they would reject Christ when they were a few years older just because of what they saw in me. But I prayed all the time for the healing of memories for them, and for the breaking of generational curses of addiction that had come from up my family line. I just hoped somehow through my mess they would see a message and through my tests, they would see a testimony. Despite my struggles I had seen miracles and knew the power of God.
I knew that they needed to experience God for themselves and prayed often that God would reveal Himself to them so no matter what they had seen of me in my past they would come to the Lord because of their own experiences. That prayer was answered in both my boys lives on one occasion after a church service. They were maybe 10 & 8 years old. I had decided to stop at the Chinese place by the beach on the way home and eat some lunch. On the way. I asked my son Micah what he learned in Sunday school. He said “We learned about God’s favor, and how we Christians can have it.” I was happy to hear he was learning good solid biblical teaching. I was not, however, prepared for what was to come next.
As we pulled into the parking lot, Micah looks over to me and says, “Hey dad, lets pray for favor in the restaurant!” “Huh?” I was struggling for an answer and I thought he would forget in a minute. Nope. As we parked the truck he looked over at me again and said “What about the favor? Pray for it dad!” I was up against a wall. By now my younger son Jesse had become intrigued with this whole favor thing, and was also staring me down for an action prayer. I said, “You know son, God loves the prayers of the little children! You should pray!” It wasn’t that I was afraid to pray, I just could not think of how God could give us favor in a restaurant.
So Micah said a short prayer like “Dear God, please let us have some of your favor in here, Amen.” Precious – Yet very scary to me. What could possibly happen? We would each be given an extra fortune cookie? I just could not see it but I had no choice. His childlike faith was expectant. I was so encouraged by his faith but did not want him to be let down.
In this case, it was me with the little faith. While I doubted and worried I was about to see a life changing experience for my two boys that to this very day they recall vividly. It set a foundation for their faith and it was the answer to my prayer that they would both experience God. To me, I know also God was dropping some Excellent Grace on me because what happened was exactly what I wanted, a personal experience for them.
So here is what happened the moment we left the truck after the prayer; I opened the door for them to walk in and we waited about three minutes for the hostess. I was still more frustrated than a hornet trapped in an old Coke can, just trying to imagine what favor we could get before we left. The hostess came and grabbed three menus and asked us to follow her. We walked to the table she stopped at, waiting for her to lay the napkins or whatever down, and let us be seated. She didn’t do that though. Instead, she took a glance at all of us with a very serious look on her face, and then she reached around me to tap Micah on the shoulder.
Obviously curious what was going on, I totally stuck my face right in the way to hear what she was to say to him. What business does she had with my 10-year-old? She proceeded around me and looked Micah dead in the eye and serious as a heart attack and said. “Sugar, you are eating for free today!” No reason, rhyme or even explanation! She just walked away as if nothing unusual had taken place.
I was kind of numb about it at first thinking only of how come she picked him. Duh, she picked him because he prayed with the faith of a child for favor and sure enough he got it. That incident was one of the most powerful testimonies my kids ever saw and we still talk about it once in a while today. Not only did God grant me answered prayer about my children not running from Him, but He went further and straight up did a miracle for a 10-year-old who asked for it. Simple, simple faith it was.
To this day I count that incident as a shining example of how God gave me something I did not deserve, a miracle for my boys to see that solidified their faith in God at a very young age. It may not work the same in every situation, but it did that day, and I needed a second chance for their faith to not be crushed by past circumstances. To this day, now in their 20’s, they are both grounded and rooted in the Christian faith. I am so very grateful God showed up and showed off with His Excellent Grace on that day.
We all have heard rumors, scandals, or just nasty talk about preachers in today’s world. Whether they were true, false or maybe a little of each, the fact is that they were all in the press and they all got attacked and mocked and accused of many things. The reason I bring this up is because I was thinking about Billy Graham these last few days. I was recalling all of the times I heard about his affairs, scandals, money hungry ways, and every behavior that I remember hearing about Billy Graham in my lifetime. The problem was, I could not recall any. Not one incident that was in the media concerning Billy Graham.
At first I thought to myself maybe I am too young to remember all his dark times. However after doing some research on him I was surprised to find out that not only was he a straight shooter with very few accusations of any type, but that to the contrary he had set records on the other side. He preached in nearly all the countries in the world, he was called on by more presidents and world leaders than anyone in history for spiritual advice, and he lived a clean life throughout his ministry. Was Billy Graham a sinner? Of course. He had the same disease we all have, according to the Bible, the sin disease we were born into. But he had an outstanding way of standing firm against the sins that so easily entangle many people and preachers today.
I want to give my two cents as to why Bully Graham lived and died as the greatest spiritual mentor in the history of this planet. There are five things I believe he did that made him the man able to excel at his calling like no other.
1- He was humble. There was never a hint of him thinking he was better than anyone in the world, as a matter of fact I think he pointed that out himself all the time.
2-He obeyed his calling. Billy Graham sacrificed much of his beloved family time and missed out on many important events simply because he put God’s call on his life before everyone and everything else.
3-He was consistent. Billy Graham was the same whether he was preaching in Haiti, or Egypt to the rich. There was no favor for either. He did not try to please people according to their culture, although respectful of each.
4- He could not be bought. Billy Graham was not interested in perks and special treatment and often turned down any opportunity to have greater housing, or meals then who he was around. He was equal to everyone and better than nobody.
5- By far and the most powerful reason I believe Billy Graham was the man he was is because he did something that is rare in today’s pulpit. He preached the Gospel as it reads in the Word of God. Never watered it down whether he was talking to a muslim imam, or to an atheist. The reason Billy Graham produced more spiritual fruit than any human in history other then Christ Himself, is because he understood that the power of the Gospel is what draws people and fills pews. Not canoe trips and fancy luncheons. It was his passion to preach the Jesus of the bible and Him alone. He knew the secret that most today don’t know or don’t practice today; stay true the truth of the Gospel of Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit will move in mighty ways.
John 14:6 says ” Jesus said ” I am the way, the truth and the life. No man shall see the Father except through me.” This is a truth that Billy Graham NEVER compromised no matter who he was speaking to. He knew that sticking with the truth would bring forth a harvest, and boy did it. Stadiums filled to capacity all over the world everywhere he went. The most admired of spiritual leaders. Even those who professed another ” way” or ” religion ” flocked to see him, and I believe it was because no matter what hat they wore in the religious world, something inside them knew that they knew that they knew that what Billy Graham preached was the absolute truth.
I would love to have a front row seat at the judgement when rewards are handed out to the faithful of believers. I don’t think any eye has seen nor has any ear heard the things Billy Graham is now facing. How awesome of an example for us all, and what an incredible honor to live in a time when we got to hear him and see him, even if on television and in books. Thank you Rev. Graham for giving us all something to hope for in Christ, and someone to be like on earth, in you.
I have reached a point in the last year that I am going to act on some things that have been just eating me up for some time. There are several things I could go into, but I am sticking with the one that is bothering me and doing the most damage to society in general to write about today. The issue is concerning your personal beliefs and my right not to have them shoved down my throat everywhere I go. Many of you already know where I am going with this but I encourage to read through this anyhow.
Each day I leave my house I see my neighbors taking their kids to school and it never fails they have a kid with a tee-shirt on preaching it. I send my kids to school and sure enough even on the walls of the hallways I see posters and other signs of it. I go to the store and I see this brain washing going on in the clothing section, the toy section and even the checkout girl will sometimes have a shirt on or a button on with this propaganda on it. I cannot take my family to a movie anymore because it seems these days there is almost always a movie on the marquis about this guy.
If you choose to idolize and worship this imaginary dude, do so on your own time, because I should not have my family be forced to see it, read about it and be given tickets to your ” conventions” and events to celebrate your pretend friend which in my opinion is for the weak-minded. We do just fine in life without your crutch.
I am formally announcing the formation of a group to ban together and pool our resources to fight for these symbols . If it takes every penny we have we need to live in a free world where our kids are not brainwashed by these cult groups who feel a need to create some pretend friend in the sky who can fly around in the air and watch over cities and people who follow him. As a matter of fact do you people have any idea how many billions of dollars are spent each year to buy all these trinkets and shirts and look a like figures? Its amazing.
The other day I was in the grocery and the two teenagers behind my family and I in line were blabbing about him right in public! Blah Blah Blah I had to remind my kid’s after words that those guys were really out there and had mental health issues.
That is what this country needs. Some formal opposition to the belief of this ” superman”. Why should we have to see posters of him in our schools and on our backpacks. Why should I have to be subject to that ridiculous image of their ” superman” at almost every place I go?
So what do you all think? What do you mean it s a dumb idea because Superman does not exist? Does this mean it would be valid only if Superman was truly real? If it was truly irritating to some people because they would rather not hear his name, much less see his face?
If you think it is a dumb idea to propose a ban on Superman propaganda and get the name out of schools and public places, then you surely know Superman does not exist. Therefore it would be silly to spend millions of dollars to avoid hearing or seeing his image anywhere, right?
And so the same applies to Jesus Christ correct? If you really think about it, the only reason anyone would want to pay millions to avoid the name of Jesus, would be to ease the conscience – correct?
The truth of all this is that as the Bible states, we all have knowledge of God. The only reason anyone would make any effort to squash the name of Jesus or prevent yourself from being exposed to Him or His word, would be to temporarily avoid Him at any cost. But what about when this life ends for you? How will you sidestep judgement? You cannot.
We have all heard the term ” displaced anger” before at some point. The question is, what is it, really? Some people might answer that it’s like stubbing your toe on the way into your house after work, and when your kid runs up and tries to hug you, you raise your voice and tell them get away for a minute because you are in too much pain to be rational. I suppose on the surface that could pass for an example.
What I am talking about is a deep-rooted bitter angry feeling that is brought on by certain triggers, and the people around you must suffer the consequences. When I was about 10-14 years old, I was a very angry kid. I was not the type to take other kid’s lunch money or start fights everyday. I did however feel that under the right circumstances, I was capable of really doing some damage to others. I already was with my words and cut downs and all that. At the time I had no idea that my sense of anger had to do with my life, my family, my absentee father and all the terrible abuse and violence I witnessed along with suicide and other things all before 12.
Years ago in college we were studying the topic and it all started to make sense to me. I had hurt so many people in my younger years because I myself was very wounded. Even in my late teens or early twenties I can remember going bowling or golfing with family or friends. If I hit just one or two bad shots in a row, that would prevent me from breaking my own record, I would throw a tantrum the size of a 19-year-old. I would not speak to anyone for hours while they enjoyed the game, i would just mope. It really bothered me but I had no clue how to get rid of it. Truly it was not any college degrees that got me out of it. What finally made me realize just how idiotic I looked was when I became a foster parent to 6 teenagers for 5 years.
You want to talk about displaced anger?? Wow these kids rocked my world the first year as I was totally unprepared for what their awful lives had turned them into. It was when I had to point out all the time to them that their behavior to another was uncalled for and unfair, and ruthless sometimes even bringing others to tears for something they had no involvement in. Ouch. It really started hitting home that I was them and they were me. However this time I could track the reasons. I could read their files and see who beat them or raped them in their life. It answered many questions for me about me.
I can honestly say that today it is very rare for me to take my anger out on anyone that had nothing to do with my problem in the first place. It took a mirror image of myself over and over each day to catch on to what I had been doing.
I was truly hurt and angry now, be sure of that. However when I sat down over time with a trusted friend of mine several times and went over my life and issues, I was able to take the feedback I needed. I needed to both subconsciously and consciously wipe away the anger directed to people who had nothing to do with it. Next I needed to choose how to deal with the person who really did hurt me or in my case people who had hurt me at a young age.
Should I get in their face and let them have it? Blame them for my issues and leave mad?
After discussing the options with my buddy ( also a therapist ) we decided that in the case of my dad it would do me more harm than good to talk with him, It had been decades since we spoke. However I was not off the hook. We decided a straight forward letter to him would be in order mentioning the hurtful things that caused me so much pain and shame.
However to my dismay, my buddy said that in order for me to be released from the bondage of bitterness ( unforgiveness breeds bitterness) I would have to tell him in the letter that I was hereby forgiving him for any time he accused me, abused me, beat me, or hurt me.
What??? Forgive him? Surely you jest I thought.
Nope. It was real.
I did the letter and then over time went on and thought about anyone who had ever hurt me and decided to forgive them as well. I did not have to go in person I could make it a prayer even, but my heart must be genuine as we cannot trick God. He knows whether we really are forgiving or not. By the way I never said we must forget. Just forgive.
These days I walk around without this 300lb bag of bitterness wrapped around my heart with a wick on it ready to explode at any time. I was set free of the hurt as I set others free in my own heart and to God.
I could write pages on this, but I really think the main message has already been addressed. Its action time. Or its time to stay bitter and enjoy that more.
Maybe this is for just one person who is struggling today with an issue like this. If that is the case it well worth posting. I can tell you that God’s ability to heal memories is much greater than man’s ability to inflict pain.
Why not set yourself free today? I bet you never go back.
Visualize Whirled Peas.
Everyone please take time to read Cherie’s bio below. We are so very happy to have a specialist in her area of service on board with great experience and education on coaching women and marriage situations. She is involved in a plethora of outreaches including a podcast, radio show and of course her counseling/ coaching. We will be making much more available to you on how to access her shows or podcasts and services in general. Her contact info is at the bottom of this page. Please welcome her and feel free to call on her with any questions about your situation!
If I had the chance, I would sit down with you, make you a cup of tea and spill my mistakes in marriage. In essence, I would share my story with you. I wouldn’t stop there though. I know that it’s only because of God’s mercy that I have a thriving marriage and family today.
Bill and I have been married for twenty-four years and we honestly look forward to loving each other for as long as God gives us. It wasn’t always this way though. Four years into our marriage Bill told me in a phone call that he wanted a divorce. I had received salvation just a few months before this and he felt I was changing too much for his liking. He didn’t enjoy me any more and was no longer happy in our relationship. I hung up the phone and went straight to God with it. In that pivotal moment of my life, God asked me a powerful question,
“Will you run or will you stay and fight?”
Run is what I always did when things got to hard emotionally for me. I ran to music and hid in it for hours. Or I would run away literally ending the relationship that was being impacted. But this time was different. This time God was asking me if I would stay. I wanted to stay. I wanted to fight, but I didn’t know how. I had failed so many times before. My past includes a divorce and 3 children that were hurt by my failures. God promised me that He would teach me how to fight but it would have to be His way and not my own. I said yes and He started me on the journey that I have called Boot Camp for so long.
That day started a fight I had never walked through before. During my own personal boot camp my heart was shattered. My faith was tested. My identity was ripped to pieces. It seemed that nothing was safe. Even then, I still chose to stay in the fight because God had given me a vision of what my marriage could look like at the end of my journey. Bill fought against me with everything he had within him. He yelled at me more than he talked to me. He made me feel like I was worth nothing and my life had no value with him. He attacked every area of me including how I was raising our children and the type of wife I was becoming. One day in a fit of anger he threw his wedding ring out the door and told me, “My life ended the day I married you!”
These were days I just wanted to stop fighting and run away. My heart could not take any more. Giving him what he wanted had to be easier than what I was enduring. It was on one of these days that God said the following words to me,
“Be still and know that I am God.”
Those words turned into thousands instantly as the Holy Spirit began to teach me what they meant. This happened many times over the course of my fight for my marriage. What I learned is so valuable that my marriage was saved!!
Can you relate to me on some level? Have you been through something like this in your own marriage? Have you thought about giving up and giving in? I want to encourage you to stay in just a little longer. The ending of your marriage doesn’t have to happen. If you are willing to give God a season of your life, I am willing to counsel you on how to stand strong and fight the way God has designed us to. Today, Bill and I are strong and our life is full as God has used my season of Boot Camp to teach me many more lessons since then.
My background ~
I knows what it’s like to be an imperfect wife and I’m well aware that my past would have been my future if it had not been for God’s intervention in my life and my obedience to follow His voice. I wasn’t always obedient. I resisted God in the beginning because He was asking me to change first. I felt enough change was happening in me and Bill was the one God needed to concentrate on. What I didn’t know then is God wasn’t just teaching me how to fight for my marriage He was getting me ready to fight for marriages all over the world. My mission is to challenge you to take a stand for your marriage and then teach you how God has designed us to love our husbands during the challenges we all face in marriage. My marriage is a living testimony of God’s “Grace Grace” (Zechariah 4). Your marriage can be turned around and restored as well. But you have to be willing to listen to voice of the Holy Spirit and change as He directs you to. He will ask you to do some hard things (I have a long list myself). Change is good, especially when God uses it to draw us closer to Him.
No matter where your marriage stands, I want to encourage you that God is big enough to not just help you stay married but to also teach you how to enjoy a blessed marriage for a lifetime. I know that I have to be very candid in sharing everything I have learned through trial, error, and prayer to turn my strained and struggling marriage around. I can help you through it. You just have to willing to try. I have been counseling wives for more than 10 years now and have witness God redeem and restore many marriages. Their fight wasn’t easy but they stood firm in their faith and God and
Work With Me
So, what is your story? Would you like to learn how to fight for your marriage? Or grow deeper in your walk with the Lord? Maybe break free from your past and strongholds? I would be honored to work with you. I am certified biblical counselor and certified Biblical Life Coach. I’ve been counseling and training women for more than 10 years and have witnessed God redeem and restore many marriages. I would be honored to work with you. Click HERE to check out my session rates and more.