Special; On Parenting- For Parents Of Children With Disabilities…

If you caught my brief bio posted the other day you may have seen that I was responsible write each IEP ( Individual Education Plan ) for all of the students in the schools I  started. As a matter of fact, this blog title (in part)  was named after the unbelievable flaws I saw while doing this. The school boards typically don’t offer parents the help that your child is entitled to if they have a documented disability.

I like to think of a child with a ” disability ” as a child with a ” different ability”

At an IEP meeting, a  ” Staffing Specialist ” from the board is there to represent the board and throw in the hat what they are willing to offer as far as support. Exactly like the psychiatrist who tells you your son or daughter has some  ” disorder ” usually you are at the mercy of their opinion or decision. That should never be the case. However how are you to know what is right and what isn’t?

Simple – email me and I will help you get the help, assistance and services your child deserves!

dontlabelmykid2@gmail.com

( when you email me, please do not go into the entire story, but just the type of situation it is, and your best contact number- I like to hear it straight from you so I can get the details I want and need to help!)

Parenting 101- Got Skills? You Better Or They Wont. Role Modeling & Social Skills.

I am amazed when I walk through Wal-Mart and see a mother dragging a crying 4-5 year old  by the arm yelling

SHUT UP! DO YOU HEAR ME, YOU ARE GOING TO GET YOUR LITTLE ASS WHIPPED WHEN WE GET HOME”

Wrong on so many levels.  But to keep this short , I will point out just a few reasons why this approach never works.

1- You cannot command a child to do something that you are currently reminding them you yourself are incapable of- like  being quiet.

2-Its highly unlikely that ANY child (that can hear)  is going to think ” hmm, I think I will pull it together now that I know I have an  ass whippin  coming when we leave, I’m pumped!”

3-If you want your child to incorporate  any skill  into their daily routine, YOU must first model it, consistently. The ” do as I say not as I do” rule is obsolete.

There are at least 100 valuable social skills that must be taught to any of us in life. About 25 are needed to function successfully as an adult. For a child ages 5-18 it varies by age, but 3-4 for the young child and 15 for the teen are necessary to get through school and relationships without much turmoil.

There is no  “ skill genie ” or  ” skill angel ”  that comes in the night and teaches your child the skills. So they must learn them from someone else….yep thats right.  but, if you choose not to teach them – don’t sweat it, they can always pick up little Johnny’s skill set at school, you know the one who always gets suspended and calls his 3rd grade teacher a slut.

If you want your home to run smoothly, there must be consistency and clear explanation of what is expected. I will take the top two most important social skills ( in my opinion ) that I have taught for 20 years, and break them down here so you can see how you should explain them to your child.

1- Following instructions

a- Look at the person

b- Say ok

c Check back when finished


2- Accepting No ( for an answer)

a- Look at the person

b- Say ok


As I mentioned, these are the top two out of the 100 I train on. You should have at least 15 skills you use to interact with your teen and 4-7 for young  who cannot retain much more.

Remember, the trick is developing a motivation system in your home that is not some temporary fly by night bribe system just so you can get a quiet night and take a long bath. Every reward and consequence your child gets should be a decision your child has made because you have taken the time and effort to creat a system that needs no arguing or debating about. Its built into your family dynamic.

Lastly for this little sample, if you think your children don’t want boundaries set for them ( specific guidelines) you are wrong. Kids are desperate for boundries. As a matter of fact we adults are desperate for boundries. What would you feel like if you jumped on the freeway tomorrow to go to work, and there was a giant neon sign that said

  ” NEW RULES ” AS OF TODAY -THERE ARE NO SPEED LIMITS, NO RULES ON SAFE DRIVING OR ANY OTHER GUIDELINES AND NO MORE EMERGENCY RESPONSE TEAMS”

How safe would you  feel knowing that  anyone could pull a NASCAR on you  and draft you at 125 MPH-  or trade some paint with you sending you and your vehicle rolling  down the hill on the side of the road.

So of we grown ups need some guidlines, ow much more do our children need them.


TJ

( I am an award winning behavior specialist who has built hundreds of behavior programs to implement in homes of small familes who just want one system to implement so they can quit constant arguing all the time. I also have been hired to put behavorial sysytems in place in large companies to make their own staff get along better)

I was even hired to train all the doctors and staff of a hospital psyhiatric unit how to get along , proving that no matter who you are or how old you are there has to be consistency.

As a foster parent, I created and implented daily systems for very abused and defiant teens and was successful in all. About 50 teens.

If you are tired of unpredictable behavior and response in your family, I would love to help build a system to fit your needs. Once in place you simply maintain it and I will always be available to help with any break downs in the system. Or you can keep living like you are…

(Yeah, I Agree )- so my email is —-dontlabelmykid2@gmail.com-contact me today to set up a personalized- DLMK! Care Plan for your family.

TJ

Another Body … Just Another Bum.. A Drunk Most Likely… Should Have Made A Life For Himself. Right? No. That Could Be Us…. { Turning The Corner- Don’t Label My Kid! Lets Do It!} 2017- Taking It Up A Level..We Need Each Other..

Mental Health. Looks like this pretty much , right?  I took this picture 2 days ago. You know why? I assumed when I contacted the law to pick the body up they may want some documentation of when and where I found the guy.  Not that its any big deal, I see these bums all day long here in Daytona. Heck You and me could have ended up like that if we didn’t make the right choices, right? Whatever. Who are we kidding. But for the grace of God, there goes me.

In this case I got to walk away feeling better then I initially thought. You see, when I realized he was stiff, and smelled bad I just instinctively went to see if he had any ID to give the law. I was quite shocked when he about jumped when my hand touched his jacket pocket. He was alive! Sort of. Mike, as I later learned was his name was so scared I came to hurt him that he was shaking, I sat down with him and told him it was all good and I help people like him. I am a social worker. I help all people. No matter the age, race, issues, addictions, etc.

I know you cant see all that well in this picture as far as his age and all, but after we had talked awhile he shared a little about his life. Take a guess as to his age? Just do it, ball park.

Mike is 51.

I was able to offer him some options that he never knew were there. I know because that is my gift. We all have gifts, and in my case I have the ability to identify what people need to make their situation the very best it can be. I have done it for my entire career as a clinical social worker. I have worked with teens, parents, mental health patients, addicted folks, poverty stricken, violent people, even the most seriously developmentally disabled people in the world, literally. I have been called on to improve the quality of life for those who are deaf, dumb, blind, and aggressive. Can you imagine? The people in that arena that I ran programs for were abused so badly as babies that even though many were born ” normal” they had some of the most evil parents and caregivers you could imagine. Tossed in dumpsters as babies left to die, left on the hot Florida beaches as infants simply because the mom or dad was too lazy to bring them to a fire station or another outlet who would gladly have taken them in.

I started a school for 60 felons, ages 11-18. Gang members, 12 year old kids running crack at 3am on school days for their own parents. I lived for 5 years with 45 teens who were sexually abused very severely. Every group of people I worked with I was so thankful to have a God given gift to see through the outside and meet the true need on the inside. Now, before anyone thinks I am bragging – it could not be further from the truth. I am so  ” ungifted ” in some areas that men should be – lol- I remember a time when I had my young boys with me in my truck and I noticed my wipers were bad. I could not see through them. I stopped at the Auto Zone , ordered up 2 wipers in a manly voice…and spent the next 30 minutes in the parking lot trying to figure out how to put the blades on until my 7 year old son took pity on me. He installed them in 5.

new life

If you have followed me long you will note that although I share my personal struggles, and trials, I have never laid out an ” I love me post” about my accomplishments in my gifts. One reason is because I realize it is a gift. I can help anyone, in any situation, no matter what the circumstances. I just don’t feel comfortable bragging about something that I was given. Oh, believe me – I can hang with the best of the braggers. I have the degrees, the awards and all that jazz. I could not even tell you where any of them are right now. I don’t care. I care about educating people and helping them save time, money and stress.

What I love most about what I do is I know every single job duty all those people and more have. But I don’t have to become each one. I sure can steer you to who will actually help you and who wants your money. I can tell you that in many cases I have not been able to get to the parent or family in time before they got taken for a ride to the tune of tens of thousands of dollars and more. That’s the reason I am so determined to hold providers of mental health, addictions, behavioral health, and juvenile delinquents accountable for what they do. I know what they should be doing – but you don’t. I am not a psychiatrist, but if you have ever read my home page ” mental heath- its a crazy business” you know I do not mince words. Why? I know the truth.. Do want to know how many doctors or psychologists, psychiatrists have written me nasty letters over the 4 years I have been slamming them? ZERO.

I am sharing this for a reason. I am hanging my shingle again. For 4 years I have poured my heart out on here about my entire life. Its time to help you all get to where you need and want to be. And I am asking you to trust your family or personal needs into my care. I make the same promise I have kept my entire career. I will NEVER leave you broken. An I will certainly never leave you broke.  I don’t discharge my families when they go through a rough patch financially. I love using my gift. You may have noticed I have never taken a dime for any thing here, I do not sell ads like some. This audience that you all are was hand picked. I have never connected to the internet, other then this WordPress sight.

Last check this blog has had visitors from 65 countries ( that I know of ) and followers from at least 25 that I know of. That’s not my doing. It is no accident. You all are here for a reason. I am here to help.

When Mike Carey came along and was willing to join with this mission, I was and still am ecstatic. Why? Because Mike and I share a similar passion. We both love to use our gifts to help others. We both will never leave anyone hanging until they are well.  I am gong to show you a real life example of how God has already used Mike in my own family. Most of you know I have 2 grown boys, and 2 baby girls. Well, babies to me, they are 5 & 10.

This is my baby Shelbi..

My baby had 72 sticks with a needle that her doctor insisted on to test for allergies. For nothing. Next up he said – blood work! No. No way.. But what can I do? Better late then never – I called our resident gifted man in the healing of diseases. He said ” you took her where” ? ( made me feel even lower lol) –  No more he said , get her on the phone with me tonight for a minute or two. I was thinking to myself-  Hello!! What was I thinking? Tonight Shelbi said hello to Mr. Mike for about 2 minutes, and 10 minutes later he says ” oh she has some poisoning in her system and a viral infection. Go to your local health food store and get 2 items ( like 5 bucks each) and in 7 days it will be gone.

HUH?? What? Why did I forget the other people I have sent to him who had major diseases go away? Anyways no blood work and that’s  Mikes gift.

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If you need physical healing – take advantage of  this gift right in front f you . If its healing in any other area, call on me. I work on a case by case basis, until the job is done. I want you all to take this email address down.

Dontlabelmykid2@gmail.com – to help with Tj-

that is your direct line to me. I will be adding a toll free number as well but for now get me there. I will develop with you what I call a  “Plan of Care ”

There is NO issue you can throw at me that I havent done a hundred times. Confidentially we will put it all in place and work it out financially It sure would make me feel good if you all would entrust your needs to Mike and I. I thank you in advance . .

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With all we are trying to accomplish through this platform of Don’t Label My Kid!  It would really make a big difference if you all would commit to utilizing the gifts that Mike and  I have- for your own family. so that we can keep on helping others and continue trying to do what we do ..put pedophiles away -heal families -help addicts-  bring families together and just grow spiritually , emotionally and physically.

God Bless you all . Please Step up for this..

Tj

100% True Funniest Parent Story I can Remember…About My Own Child.

My older son is 22 and a sharp shooter in the Army, full-time college student and full time worker. I am praying he never reads this, and am fairly confident he wont. He does not take much interest in my writing.. ( I know, I don’t get it either). For the purpose of this story I will call him ” stinky “. It takes place in a quiet southern town about 50 miles northwest of Orlando Fl. in about 1995. In a grocery store called Publix.

Stinky was 2 years old and riding on the kid part of the shopping cart, you know – the part where they just stare at you until something on the shelf catches their eye, they lunge for it, you swerve, they cry? Yeah that type deal. Well Stinky and I were at about the half way point of our shopping trip when I noticed a slight scent coming from the same vicinity that Stinky was sitting. At first I panicked of course but then as a new first time dad would do, I ignored it and reminded myself that I had out a ” pull up” on him right before we came in the store.

This was right when pull-ups had come out, and were a true Godsend, just in case. We went about another aisle down and I noticed the scent was getting stronger and I admit I began to worry a little. Not knowing what exactly to do in the middle of this giant store, I began to slow my roll and let the others pass me by while strategically heading to the diaper/wipes/paper towel isle. As I approached this isle, I happened to glance down at the newly waxed tiled floor of the grocery.

We got a problem.

I remember thinking to myself that I had not recalled seeing any little brown dots peppering the tiles before. I quickly grabbed the nearest bag of paper towels, ripped them open and leaned down, to wipe-the dots off the tiles around me. I remember going in reverse, and wiping up a few tiles behind us as well. It was then I realized that I had no idea this breadcrumb poop trail had been going on. I just remember ripping through the paper towels and making sure I grabbed ” Bounty ” the “quicker picker upper”. Within seconds I found myself going into a kneeling position, one hand on the cart ( pulling backwards) and one hand full of paper towels wiping poop drops as I went backwards dodging other shoppers and acting as if I was looking for my contact or something.

Within a minute I was zipping back at high rate of speed, weaving and bobbing between other shoppers. I was good. So good that within about 4 minutes and 2 rolls of Bounty, I had reached the end of the trail..finally. I wiped up the last splatter and casually made my way to the men’s room. You see, new parent or not, I am a smart cookie. I remembered to bring an emergency outfit and pull-up for such a time as this. I am not bragging here, but within 5 minutes my boy and I were calmly exiting the men’s room as if nothing had gone down..er, well you get it .

As I calmed down we shopped some more, and finally decided we had all we needed. I gave myself a little mental pat on the back for handling it as well as I did. We rolled up to the checkout counter and waited our turn. I think I was playing peek a boo or something as we waited. Heck I thought, nobody needs to know about this one. It was our little secret. So finally the line died down, and we pulled up and began unloading our groceries. The checkout girl was kind enough to help and we began to toss things on the belt. About 2 minutes into it, I noticed the girl making a funny face and she began to cough. Not the ” I have a cold ” cough, but a sickly and frowning face type of cough. Within a minute she began to let out a quiet but audible shriek and then said then she said these words ” What is that smell?”

I’m cool – I mean I cleaned it all up. I thought.

As it turns out, dad forgot to check one spot- the spot directly below the kid’s poop shoot in the cart. As it turns out I guess the girl happened to pullout a package of ground beef from directly below Stinky. The package had little brown droppings on it. Before I could get her attention, she was on the store loudspeaker begging for assistance on isle 4. It went something like ” clean up on isle 4 ” and by the time she had run her big mouth all over the speaker, a parade of bag boys, and a few managers had made their way up to see and smell what went on.

I remember a collective ” ooh gross ” from the customers in line behind me while scattering to another line, me begging to pay the bill, and stinky just smiling through it all. What started as a proud daddy and son shopping day,  ended as a walk of shame to the parking lot in slow motion. A group of bag boys were sent to follow us and retrieve the cart so they could rinse and scrub it. I humbly put Stinky in his car seat and we drove off into the moon-light.

To this day I cannot eat raisinets or milk-duds. I know, I know its gross.

tj

2017 Series -Getting Through The Dark Times; Faith It ‘Til Ya Make It!

 

In the last 4 years I have written about many topics from parenting to depression, addiction to PTSD, medication, suicide, therapy  and so much more. It seems like a lot but as I have always said, I don’t speak on anything that I haven’t lived through personally or at the very least studied professionally. In the beginning I thought writing about so many different types of issues would make it seem like life is filled with nothing but bad stuff. However  I learned two important things in the last four years; I am not alone, and people need to hear from others who can relate.

So far I have mostly  discussed all the different types of problems and medical mental health struggles and family issues that exist. And there’s plenty to discuss no doubt. . Up until now, I have not really delved into how we deal with these issues as we go through these dark trials. Its imperative that we have some way of staying grounded during these times we walk  through the valley.

 It’s very important that we have some sort of an anchor to keep us from drifting too far away from reality when we feel so lost in such darkness, and with so few friends. As most of you have understood, if I shared my life experiences, some of these times are gone through very much alone and there are not many people around that can relate. Unless you really search. And most of the time we don’t feel like searching for anything when we’re barely able to wake up every day and get dressed. Having been through very traumatic times that caused depression, and nightmares and loneliness and sometimes the inability to function normally. I can understand the darkness that prevails if we allow it to.

 There’s a few things in my life that I can honestly say, are the only reasons that I am here today, both physically and mentally spiritually and emotionally. I know that if it took those things to keep me saying then all of you also had to have some way that you’ve coped something that held you together. and some? To that you’ve used to make it to the point, we are able to even write about it today on a blog. The truth is professionally I’ve seen that it isn’t a very high percentage of us that are able to make it even this far- in fact we are a  very blessed group of people to have come through what we have and able to share it with other people. Speaking of sharing it with other people that is a critical piece in healing. It isnt always about us -the spotlight can’t always be on us even in our dark times and the truth is some of the ways out of these dark times the very quickest are by reaching out to others and pulling them up with the knowledge we have.

Sometimes when you need a friend the most you got to go and be a friend to someone. . Sometimes when you need encouragement the most you need to go and encourage someone. And even sometimes when you need financial help, you need to reach out to someone who you know could use what little bit you have and help them.. The point is as tempting as it is when we are in these dark times, the worst thing we can do is send out invitations for a pity party. I have always found some good advice from a guy that sings a song full of truth abut these times. I would like to share this song with you and I’ve shared the one with lyrics so you can read along… Please take 3:38 minutes out and watch it…at the end of this post. It may just resonate with you somehow…( you may have to click on it to play it)

So as I kick off the on going series on how we have made it to the point we are, I would ask that you all share any advice that you have. I shared all the problems lol- now I need help with looking at many solutions. I am leaving this wide open, and welcome any guest posts on the topic. Like I said – the more you share the more therapeutic it is.

So lets see where this goes y’all

If You’re Going Through Hell..

Private: Invitation Only–Please Join Us In The Fight To Provide Effective Services To Those Suffering. Tj & Mike

**This information is intended for the recipient and nobody else. Please lets keep this in house.. Greetings , You all are in for some very exciting news!  If you have received this invitation you are a part of a special group of people. You are special to us in that you are followers of Mike […]

 

 

https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B_T8zNEl5CBkbEs3WmZoZHZnQ2c/view?usp=drivesdk

Above and below are 2 different ways to hear Tj  give his   personal greeting and update. In order to hear it you may have to load the open. If neither will work for you just skip it I will be doing these regularly.

udio- TJ greeting and update of the Dont Lablel My Kid! Projects(I

**This information is intended for the recipient and nobody else. Please lets keep this in-house..

Mike Carey alternative Solutions 4 Health & Tj from Dont Label My KId!

I made a quick audio update ( both links above, but had a few problems on one of the times I tried to open, you may have to download first but if its more than a few minutes just let it go, as it is jut an update and I will be dong these from time to time…tj


Greetings ,

You all are in for some very exciting news!  If you have received this invitation you are a part of a special group of people. You are special to us in that you are followers of Mike Carey – Alternative Solutions 4 Health, or TJ -(Dont Label My KId) and Mike have teamed up! That’s right we are joining forces to reach some goals and accomplish some things that have never been done before. We want you all along with us. Much is happening in the way of change and we have some exciting things in the works.

We want the people who have been supportive of us to get some too.

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(Notes- It has come to our attention that a fairly large group of bloggers were included in this private invitation who may or may not be followers of Don’t Label My Kid! Or Mike Carey .)

(After checking into it we found that you all actually are  considered by  WordPress to be followers of Don’t Label My Kid! via what I call the ‘ “undercover follower” method lol which I actually learned  is an option that I was unaware of. The other possibility is you register  so much on the site you are considered followers.

Either way you are blood.

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Just come on home – make it official-go click follow on this site. You do have to do that to take part so if you could make sure you all are ” legal” by like tomorrow we can stop the confusion…..And now we return to our regular programming. .)

With  Mike’s incredible knowledge and gifts in areas of  health and the mission of DLMK to serve a huge group of people worldwide who are desperate for help in the areas of mental, behavioral health and addictions it seemed a match made in heaven to team up and meet the needs of the total person in ways that have never been done. AS4H and DLMK have one thing in common.

Success rates that are at least double or more of many of the options available. That is not to say there are not very talented people working in our areas because there is. We have a unique chance to make sure that all components that a person may need in treatment, we can help with and using the same team, same model and same philosophy. Not all have that advantage.

Beliefs in how and who in treatment are absolutely identical. Both are believers in getting to the root issue; both believe in as natural of a healing as is possible; both are  committed to a return to normalcy asap. Sadly the country we live in supports financially those who keep people sick. It pays very well.

The goals of physical treatment centers and other care is already in the works. As matter of fact we will be talking with a major insurer in Florida about helping fund treatment centers! At this moment right now we have a goal to get services out to the world through virtual means. Mike can do what he does and the whole team can each help in reaching out to the world. However one thing holds us back.

It is very expensive technical work to build a portal  as we will using the Don’t Label My Kid! site as a platform. The site today has followers from 60 countries. The cost to make this happen is huge but not as a team. You are part of our team. It’s not a one-sided team and that’s why nobody else but our followers got invitations. As we succeed, you succeed. Why pay an outside investor a ton of money to help us when we can work together and meet all of our needs?

With that said – in order to reach who we need to reach we will need help.  So we are asking that you take a hard look at what is in front of you right now and consider getting involved to the extent that are able. We think no matter what level you are supporting us he return will far outweigh any monthly investment. When we need to add some service providers to our database who do you think we will utilize?

That’s right – you.

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In closing I will give a quick example or two. The placement of your blogs name on a separate page on the website goes to anyone at any level. Think about this. How much would it cost for a newspaper as or magazine/radio ads -100? More ? Even then you must hope and pray that people hear or see your ad at the very time they need your service.

Our followers are made up of people like you same demographic. That’s gold. The potential reach for your name in a day could be 500k- you see DLMK has followers that have 100k each!  So it’s a great deal. Please jump in, Today is the kick-off let’s do it up!

                               Here is our Commitment to You –

**For those come on board now, we will do something to show you our appreciation. We provide care for the total person here . We make sure that whether it’s a general doctor, a psychologist, an addictions specialist or any other type of care, that we have the best of the best.

So, to those who become any level as a founding member -we have you covered for any crisis needs in your immediate family. Free.

The 3 subscriptions are below are simply select what is best and sign up…

(We do have a few limited partnerships available. These are NOT for the average blogger or small business owner . The investment and commitment are much greater and suited for large set ups. People looking make some high level career advances with other projects we are working on and things like that. They are listed after the 3 below.)

***THIS JUST IN- PLEASE READ*****Mike Carey and I just spoke Today is 4/29/2107  at 10:40pm Eastern Time.

Mike has told me to take away the hours of consulting that go with the package if you are a Founders Club Member…Instead, when you become an active member now AT ANY LEVEL– He said PUT NO LIMIT ON IT!!! This means by subscribing you are on Mike’s List Of Clients and you NEVER have to pay for his service..

He also said as a small token of his appreciation to those who are serving, or have served in the military Everything ( all of his services) are on the house and the same goes for those in Christian Pastoral ministry or retired from it. 

Finally, if you want to become a member but cannot afford 25.00$ / Month we will offer scholarships if you can provide proof

. We also exchange services for memberships-if you have a skill we can use, or a product we can use..

Thanks in advance for trusting us and becoming Founding Club Members !


Don’t Label My Kid!  & Alternative Solutions 4 Health Founders club

                                          ~ Status Options~

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25.00-  Official Member

1-Your Blog Featured on separate page with founders only

2-Access to private database of services

*** Note – If you are wanting to bump up to GOLD but cannot afford it? Bring us 5 new members at any level and you got it .

(They must become followers of either Mike, Tj or both to be eligible.)

Subscribe as Official Member

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50.00-  GOLD Member

1-Your Blog Featured on Separate page with Founders Members only

2-Access to private database of services

3-  Founders Group Member Tag for your Homepage

4- A free hour per month of consultation with any of  team! phone Email

Subscribe as Founders Gold Member


NOTE! Want to become a Platinum member without the extra 50 bucks? No problem, bring us 5 Gold members!


100.00– Platinum

1-Your Blog Featured on Separate page with Founders Members only

2-Access to private database of services

3-Founders Group PLATINUM Member Tag for your homepage

4-1 Guest post on the DLMK site per quarter to share your blog’s mission or post a blog of your choice (these will be highlighted and recognized as a Guest Post From Founding Member-available only to Platinum members)

5- 2 hours per month of personal consultation from an actual team member to help you identify the appropriate service for you or a loved one’s personal situation.via email or phone and if the situation calls for it.

100% confidential and no longer available to non followers.

Subscribe as Founders Platinum Member

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                    The Executive Access – Boardroom Access Partners

We are also offering an entirely different type membership. They are Limited Partnerships – meaning only 10 of each are being considered at this time. The positions are for those who are aggressively pursuing some specific goals in a business, career or any pursuit that would require high-profile connections or simply need  to do more than run a small business, and need the help of a larger group to help them to the next level.

We designed these slots with a few things in mind. One is to help some of our own followers achieve their goals, so in the future they can pay it forward and continue the mission that we have started. Another is to help us achieve our financial goals so we can begin doing what we do best, help others. The financial investment for the Executive is 500/monthly and the Boardroom is 1000/month. It is the highest level of commitment on both sides that exists.

In some ways these are open to what the two sides can do for each other. We have the advantage of being able to be flexible and creative.

The primary differences between the two is one has access to the board of directors on certain issues and has a voice and even a vote on issues related to the services fund-raising project. The Boardroom Access partner is that person.

There is a process to discuss either of these. If you are interested contact Tj to set up a phone conference -tim@dontlabelmykid.com.

occasionally we will have a need for a staff member and offer it out as a regular position. Right now we are looking to fill a few part-time executive assistant positions in exchange for platinum memberships .

We hope you find just the right opportunities so we can see you grow while we grow!

thanks Mike Carey and Tj Petri

So- You Plan On Moving On Up To The Average Do You? Wow! Shooting For The Stars..(* Recommended Reading- By Me)

You may notice I recommeded this right? But its my own writing! I know, I just put down a new standard. You will understand soon..

What Or Who Are We Really Trying To Be?

Someone recently askied me this ” did you know that the post I read of yours today was xxxx  amount of words? That’s like 1200 more than the average post, I am just letting you know..”

I looked her and shook my head smirking…I said ” I know ain’t that insane nobody but me has figured out about how long a post should be, what a shame”

Now, we are friends and I was picking up what she was trying to put down. However there is a grain of truth in what I said. Not about ME being the standard, but who has the right to set a ” standard”  anyhow and is that what we are all striving for?

Can you imagine going into a job interview and when the boss says ” tell me what your ambitions are, your dreams and what you are striving to be?” So you sit up, chest out, and firmly and proudly say ” well sir , I am striving to be the average at what  I do, I believe I have what it takes to meet the ” standard”.  As a matter fact sir I currently am almost dead even with the other professionals at everything I do!

Wow- You are Hired! Right ? Is that what you would hope to hear? I would not hold your breath! Lol.. Yet Do we even realize or know what we are striving to be? Can you identify what your goal to attain really is? Is it to be ” as good as so and so” you’r professional hero? If so you might want to step it up a notch. What good is it for me to finally climb Mt. Everest just to stand on top and proudly say YES! Today I am as good as all those who stood before me! I am now rolling in the same class with some pretty higher-ups!

Wow- good for you. You  have just proven that you are capable of doing something so awesome, so incredible and so top-notch that you can now say you are just like the rest who accomplished the very same thing…lol.

You have noticed in the last 25 years or so we have plowed into, stayed in and are even trying to go further a humongous initiative to get everything done FAST!

1- Fast Food

2-Fast Books

3- Fast Travel

4-Fast EVERYTHING!

I am not exaggerating in this sense. About any ad these days for almost anything has something to do with the speed that we can get it  ” over with” …

So lets look quickly at what its done for us..

1-Fast Food- No more family dinner time at 6 no matter what where our whole posse gets together and talks about our day. Its has really reversed that into us being with our ” new ” families – coworkers almost all day, and talking about what fast food we ate by ourselves for lunch…

2- Fast travel Well, the old adage ” stop and smell the roses” is not gone totally- but the most roses have taken other jobs or are secretly looking around I think! Business is not what it once was. I was looking at my grandmother’s picture collection a few months ago. My grandfather was an incredible man. He worked 50 years as an accountant at Mobile oil after coming here from Germany at age 7 with no English language skills. He was made fun of and all but he pressed on to become one of the most awesome husbands and men in general I have ever known.

Each year at Mobile after he became fairly successful, he got a bonus. He loved to golf and had lots of cool hobbies he could have spent that on. But no matter what it was a tradition that he used his bonus to send my grandmother and a few friends of her choice on a cruise of her choice. And he was proud to do it. In the last years those cruises became world cruises! A real treat for granny and her girls. So as I looked through her albums I noticed that besides having an album for each years cruise, they were filled with pictures for each stop, each port, each special city of all the ladies smiling and laughing.

My first thought was wow, they were the standard. That’s when they did stop for each rose, they did eat together, they did make any speed in life acceptable only if it would bring them back together quicker when they were separated for any reason. Missing a dinner as a family was a bummer. My grandparents were married almost 60 years. You know what-it wasn’t rare back in their day. Today I am waiting for someone to come out with a webinar on How to marry 6x in 60 years- without leaving work-lol…

So here is my point. Not everything that glitters is platinum. I know I know gold..but that’s changed too. Some changes have been great, trains , planes and all allow us to enjoy more of  life that is if that’s what we use it for. I could go on past fast food, books, microwaves, an all that forever. I don’t think the majority of our need for speed has been the best for our families and health. However once again we created another monster we cannot feed.

Looking at the rates of the family breakdown alone is depressing. I am not saying our obsession with rushing through life has desroyed our families…wait yes I am saying that.

Don’t let the ” standard ” define you. You define the standard.

Wow, that was pretty good stuff! I am going to recommend this to a few of my friends .  WHAT ? Whats the look for?

Oh, OOPS– that’s not really, well appropriate is it? Pushing my own stuff.

Well excellent then! I will do it.

I have just set a new standard!

Make a note of that in your book of standards before you forget.

Now- how about you go and set your own standard today. But whatever you do , don’t you dare do a word count on your or my posts! LOL

I am out-

tj

 

(*today’s randomly selected letters may offend some as they involve politics/religion)

 

Deer don’t Label Mi KiDD

I sawed na post in which youd made fun of one a are fine W.Virginia teachers  who wore a TRUCK FUMP Tee to skool.. She has the righst to her politics opinion.

I beeleve you employed she was-

1-mentally challenged,

2-toothles

3-a reason for birt control,

4-chewed tobacco (so?)

5- even that since she had no children -she must be able to “out run her brother“- what kind of stupid coment is that? All because she hates Trump? Wow. You are sumething else. That’s out of line.

West Virginia Mountain MaMa

 

West Virginia Obama Mama

Bubba

 


Dear Bubba-

As much as I dislike Obama and Hillary and dummocrats, you will never hear me make any kind of statements so vile and ugly about politics.  I would not say those type things at all ( unless they were facts and true) because I do not gossip.

Not one of those comments had to do with politics, I was just commenting on her being from West Virginia. I never mentioned anything about children at all. I may, possibly inadvertently repeated a totally inappropriate joke ( i don’t think its funny) that some guy said -about

“what do you call a girl from west virginia who can outrun her brother? A virgin. ”

But again no mention of children that’s lies.

tj

 


 

Hey DLMK!

My name is mohammed m. mohaamed.,

 

I read your sad post about we muslims ” kill people and that we cause division and are confused ourselves. You are uneducated on my religion. My little son mohammed jr. knows more then you. His little sister Muhammed could read the koran to you and right before I sold her she recited the entire book to me by memory. Pretty good for 7 years old. If we kill, it is in peace as our profit mohammed says to. Maybe if you spent some time with us you would also learn how to live a peaceful life.

The only downside at all is our name book only has 2 names in it at we have for our own automatic weapons. That’s a small price to pay for peace.You say I am confused? Man oh man if my wife was in town to watch little m&m and  I didn’t have a few goats waiting I will show you some confusion

.

goat man

You Americans are stupid. You don’t know how to learn and use resources.

obamaosama

These days most 14 year old muslim boys already have their pilots license and just to mock your stupidity we had you pay for several shipments of arms thru our fine brother B. Hussein Obama’s generous donation of 3 BILLION dollars for Ramadan.  Its comical you people don’t know what pleasure is. I must now go tend my flock but we will talk again..

Signed

M&M

 


 

Dear M&M ,

I only quoted from your koran.  I apologize for offending you . Perhaps if I spent some with your people in the mosque ( do I have to check my AR at the door?) it would help.

Maybe I will see more clearly the link between the slaughters of your daughters, the dismembering of your wives, bartering your 6 year old’s off to 50 year old’s for marriage

Maybe my reward will be to reveal to me why the kids all must get pilot licenses used to crash planes not fly them…

Let me be clear on one thing.

No matter what- under any circumstances- at any time- ever- do I want t know ANYTHING about you all and your animals.-  I refuse to even think about why you and your goats…well anyways my wife leaves town too….. but the boys round here watch football during those times, go fishing, hunting…we like the humans in these parts…but hey if allah is pleased thats all that matters right? You need a check up from the neck up.

Screenshot_20170422-093111

As you see I did not post the 8 pictures of your ” girls” or whatever you call them but i did post just one as evidence all the readers that you sent this to me, and you are the one with the business idea – and I don’t appreciate offensive pictures your pleasure toys being sent here. Its repulsive. How would you like it if I sent you pix of beautiful naked women? Repulsed correct? Yes i know. So give me the same courtesy.

I think you and your new idea of putting 1000 goats under an air conditioned roof and serving drinks is nuts. That is just an undercover Muslim Strip Club. And Please do not ever use the term ” deep goat” ever again. You see I deleted all 14 times you said that in this letter.. I recommend making a way for your wife to be home more, although its no secret that the majority of non-goatees say you all purposely send your wives away all the time. That’s even more sick.

You are encouraging this Baaaaaad behavior.

tj

 A Little About Me. The Guy Behind Don’t Label My Kid!- Tj -Up Close And Personal..**sorry for issues with link will have fixed in a few hours. ..

 

Well, I thought after 4 years maybe I should introduce myself… to my ” inner circle”.

 What you are about to read is all true folks- except for some rumor about the home in the background of the picture of my wife and I -being my ” Guest House” – Right… On a Social Workers salary? Not!…

Its actually just our own humble abode. We cannot afford ” guest houses”.

Ok, alright – just got a” friendly” nudge from my wife (ouch) to tell the ” whole ” truth. So It’s actually the Biltmore Hotel, and ” technically speaking” we used our life savings to spend 2 nights there 12 years ago…   Whats the big diff?

Some people are just dream-killers.

Anyhow this really is my story in a snapshot…    ..

http://dontlabelmykid.com/Home.html

Are You Staying Or Going….                                I Dare You To Move..

                                            Are You Staying ? Or Our You Going?

 

 

 

 

 

I am about to out into words a post that quite possibly could rank to me at least in the top 3 posts I have written here . I have posted 500+.  200 or so are on the light side, unrelated to my experiences in abuse, addiction, a family peppered with suicide, depression, violence, more depression and on it goes. I suffered through many , many days, weeks and even months crawling emotionally and spiritually  towards some imaginary finish line that I could not see.

Now even though I have enough in my mind and to fill many pages here, and planned on taking my time, just 30 minutes ago that plan was scrapped. Oh not for lack of stories good and sad, spiritual journeys that have been so unreal to some that they question why I maintain any faith at all in ” God” – much less a stronger faith then ever..(and those are my Christian friends!)

Nope, just I was preparing to start this post, something just drew me to glance at the new posts on reader before I started. Well,  just like most details in my life, this was no accident at all. Other than a little bump to my pride I am good with it now.. lol

 

A new friend , fellow blogger and gifted writer named Mehul Singla  just rearranged my plan 100% and he has no clue-yet !..He just today pushed some great “6 letter posts” out and asked for feedback. I gave him my 2 cents. A few minutes later I realized I was giving us both advice. So here is the new plan. I will spare you 30 minutes of sad stories and how my life has taken its odd turns- ONLY if you promise to do 2 things.

1- After you read this blip I am almost done with please watch this video. One of my very favorite singers in the world..Jon Foreman of  Switchfoot.

Jon has touched my life for 25 years, many by this very song.  One time I recall laying on the floor of a rehab at 29 withdrawing from medications, crying out for anyone to listen-when nobody believed in me anymore. Another maybe 3 years later when began to battle major depression while being used as a guniea pig. About 2 dozen medications later I got off them all- but not before the car wreck, then being sucker punched by a guy with brass knuckles which aside from 50 stitches in my eye socket cost me much memory.

I wont get into really bad stuff like my bone disease, failed hip replacement at 44 and 6 surgeries after that leaving my famiy homeless…

So watch it- Thats #1

 

Here is THEE point- Whatever your hole, your pit, your paralyzing loss, pain, or whatever…Jon’s cry to me in this song has always been the same- ” I Dare You To Move”-

If you google ” What is the song Dare You To Move about- Jon gives an overview of why, when, how that song just became…and how in the very hardest most tragic times, it was the answer to this question that in many ways determined his destiny on earth..as it does mine each day..

To my atheist, agnostic, not sure yet- tree huggers, beer chuggers and all of y’all -lol you know I love you all the same…but an interesting piece of trivia- Switchfoot is NOT a ” Christian” band… I have seen them 3x in person and their message is always the same-

  • a message of hope and healing. ( I even smoked a Newport at a concert one time)

I know, I know exactly what you are thinking… “Tj you live on the edge”-

Well, I have calmed down some ok?

(Now secretly, I think thats just what they are called to do- UNBEAT some people who have been bible thumped to near death -lol)

Just to encourage people and live it too..

#2 – It can be just between you and you – you and God- you and a palm tree- doesnt matter- but do this- Identify you “mud puddle.” To me my mud puddles are; one part dirt from our past, 1 part self pity,  1 part fear of what lies ahead if you DO move on and 1 part liking attention we get from being ” muddy” all the time…lol

I am sorry its just the language I use! Work with me…

 

Lastly- although this can be private…often when we do begin to identifythese things, we need someone or people to reach out to,…if you find yourself with a good idea of what your puddle of choice is, do not hesitate to email me in 100% certainty of absolute confidentiality. I have learned who to know and trust in my 25  years in social work..whether immediate counseling from a trusted private and free service to the most elaborate fancy shmancy beachsie rehab where you get your own laptop with your yogurt and personak trainer all in strict confidence. Remember, I have already been where most of you have, or need to be when it comes to identifying our areas of need. Its an everyday thing for me…

peace2you

tj

 

My Friend Dileep In India -A Saint!

Raja Dilp’s Ministry-India

 

I wanted to take a minute and introduce you all to a man who I have come to know in the last year named Dileep. He is from India and he is a full-time analyst for a day job. What he does with the rest of his time is incredible and worthy of a ” 7 ” minute read lol..

Dileep is a Christian who has a small congregation in a very poor part of Guntar, India. Very bad things happen to little children there to earn money and he struggles to help his own flock with their basic needs of food and clothing. However as you can see on the website in pictures, they are not concerned so much with their own needs as they are the country that they love so much and the people who cannot even get a meal of some beans and rice. They want people to be able to eat without committing horrendous crimes or just starving.

He leads his congregation in wrapping and delivering any small amounts of food they can get and delivering it to these starving people. Take a minute to look a the website, inside their church and the people. Look at the pride in their eyes also as they prepare meager amounts of food to deliver for the Christmas Holiday. To me, it is amazing.

We all complain at some time or another about not having this or that..when the truth is we Americans live in the top 4-5% of the world when it comes to luxuries. We just take them for granted.

The letter below is an actual recent one Dileep messaged me so I thought I would share it with you all. You can hear the humility in his words, and I can tell you its genuine. Last time I checked this blog has visitors or followers from more than 65 countries, including India. I am not going to ask you to do anything specific financially for the ministry, as we don’t do that here. But I sure would not mind if a bunch of us helped in whatever way we can. Small monthly gifts or a one time gift can feed more people there then you would believe. We spend more at a dinner out with our family then they do to feed beans to dozens of families.

So I am asking that you take a minute to glance at his site and read his short letter.

What happens from there is between you and him. What happens in India, stays in India, right? lol….Or do I have that confused with another place….Anyhow thanks for checking it out – He is a good, good man. I hope we can assist in some way.

 

http://hijministries.webs.com/

 

Hello Greetings to you my dear brother and sisters in
the holy and precious name of our Almighty Lord and
Saviour Jesus Christ.
This is Dileep,I am an Evangelist
from India.Our Aims are to the Give a HOPE to the lost
and poor people by spreading the Gospel Among them and
showing Love by proving them food,clothes,Bibles and
Medical Camps.
In Our Ministry we Preach the Gospel as
Jesus said in the Book of Mark 16:15 “AND HE SAID UNTO
THEM, GO YE ITO ALL THE WORLD,AND PREACH THE GOSPEL TO
EVERY CREATURE” According to this Scripture we are
preaching and spreading the Gospel in the remote
villages and tribal villages and we also distribute the
Bibles to the poor and those who cannot afford to get a
Bible.
In Our Ministry we show our Love towards
the poor,needy and Lost,As Jesus said in the Book of
Matthew 22:39 “AND THE SECOND IS LIKE UNTO IT, THOU
SHALT LOVE THY NEIGHBOUR AS THYSELF.” According to this
Scripture we are showing our Love towards the Poor and
needy and Lost by providing them Food and Clothes,We
are doing this in order to show the Christ’s Love
because not only Gospel can save the people but also
the Christ’s love can changed the hearts of the people
and they can be saved in His Grace.
This is all about
our ministry and it’s Aims.Please pray for us and for
our ministry and if the Holy Spirit leads you please
support our ministry with your offerings which can used
for getting Bibles,Food and Clothes to the needy and
poor,Here is our website in this you can see much more
about our ministry and you can see all the pictures of
our ministry work, http://hijministries.webs.com
Thanking you all my dear spiritual family, you all are
in our prayers and thank you once again for your
prayers.I Hope and Pray that God Bless you and your
family and ministry and work,I Pray in Jesus name
AMEN!AMEN!AMEN!!!

In Christ,
Evangelist Dileep,
INDIA.

MILESTONE FOR DLMK- TODAY!

 OUR FIRST PARTNER IN THE PROVISION OF SERVICES!

For a year or more I have been  posting about the fact that we will at some point be providing services for mental and behavioral health, as well as a myriad of coaching and counseling services for addictions and many other needed services, right here, from the Don’t Label My Kid! site, and for our followers. As you know, I started this blog with the intention of educating the general public on issues related to our obsession in America with ” labeling ” almost all of us with some sort of  ” disorder ” and medicating just about anyone old enough to swallow pills.

If you have read my home page, which I know many if not all have, you know how strongly I feel about the business side of mental health that only takes place in America – and for good reason. Big pharmaceutical companies are BILLION dollar industries, and the ” circle of love ” as I call it on the home page, expands throughout much of the psychiatric industry. I don’t to belabor the point as I went into it extensively at the start of this blog and most of you here today are here at least in part because you, or someone you know has or is suffering from a mental, behavioral, or addictive issue that although treated in the past, has not improved.

I cannot say for certain that all of you fall into that category but I can say just from your feedback, comments and emails to me that several thousand if not more do have an issue related to it or another medical issues that has kept you following this blog, and reading the 500 posts on here. In a nutshell, we all have some family or personal issue that we feel we may get support from here together as a group. I know I have benefited greatly from what you all have shared, and I like to think that my 20 years in the field and my research and writing here has helped many in some way or another.

In the last year or so, I have been closer then ever to identifying who I would like to have here providing services to you all and anyone you know, via virtual counseling and coaching and yes I even have a model and plan I have been sharing with major providers who agree with all of us that this over medicated and over labeled society needs change. There are good providers who don’t hand out med’s like candy and order years of useless therapy that only serves to keep people depressed and doctors paid-in some cases. I will tell you that it is coming soon! Not just effective treatment with the least amount of drugs and therapy – but the most cost effective as well. I have been talking to only the BEST in the industry and expressing the concern we all have over the excessive costs of services..

I ma going to end that segment now because I can barely contain myself on what I am about to share..

Every once in a blue moon you meet or have a business connection with someone who just operates on an entirely different level then most of us. The amazing results and the unbelievable savings in care just stand out from everyone else. The man I am proud to introduce to you right now, starting this day as our very first partner in the pursuit of creating a new standard of care for healthcare in general- is a man who not only has results- in his years of service that are amazing- and testimonies that never seem to end- but also about diseases and ailments that nobody has had much if any success with.

He is an expert is not only the nutritional ingredients in the healing of the human body, but he has a gift – and that is what it is- a GIFT that I have never seen in my life to assist people not to treat symptoms of major diseases, but actually watch them disappear in weeks or months of working with him. I must stop now before I get too excited and write three more pages about his career…lol

However with just a quick click of a link here you can read and see for yourself the kind of incredible healing that takes place under his guidance. Not only that but he works like we need him to, virtually and by phone, from anywhere in the world.  I never had hopes of landing such a man for our site, and I was extremely surprised that he was even willing to work with anyone referred from this site at very very reasonable rates. I jokingly asked if he could throw in the first call / consultation from any of my followers for free! ( hey why not go for it) and he said YES.

 

Now I will let you read his credentials and experience, and wait for the catch, like I did…but there is no catch and here is why.  Mike Carey is a man who recognizes he was given a gift to help others.  Its a rare gift and he could easily use it to exploit people who are hurting and sick and need his help. Instead he does the opposite. He bends over backwards for his clients and as you will see he even keeps contact with the families of the person who was sick, and allows them to call him if one of their family members falls ill!

Ok -I need to stop and let you all have his contact info and website and all – I am totally overwhelmed that he is partnering with us like this and I know you all will be very thankful when you realize what he is willing to do for us, in part because he knows we all have struggles and are trying to help others through our blogging.


Without further rambling- Mike Carey can be reached at  208-968-5797 and his email is      silverwood08@gmail.com

http://www.alternativesolutions4health.com

and testimonials I believe at

http://www.alternativesolutions4health.info/testimonials

***OBVIOUSLY PLEASE TAKE TIME TO READ THROUGH ALL OF HIS INFORMATION ***

Before calling him so we don’t waste any of his time and so you know what specific questioins to ask..

 

I will obviously be dedicating  some space on the blog to put all of his contact info and more of his endless list of happy customers! For now, use the above info to contact Mike.

TJ

 

 

 

This Does NOT Work Parents!

This type of thing, besides being deceitful only serves to incite racist arguments. Whatever color a person is, trying to misrepresent them and then accusing the public of racism is weak. It happens all to much and although I am not saying people should make their child look really bad when they get in trouble, but don’t get all angry at people for calling them out for who they were at the time of the crime, or issue..

You cannot put lipstick on a pig.

tj

That’s Right Partner…

Parents- Come Over Here- Tragedy Strikes.

       God Help Parents Today To Love Their Kids.

https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation-now/2017/04/07/mom-11-year-old-killed-himself-following-twisted-social-media-prank/100160756/

 

I hate writing about things like this , but we all need to be reminded.  Here is the take away from this tragedy If you have a child this young and they feel more pressure from outside your home then the LOVE they should feel in your home you need to be loving on them a whole lot more. There is no excuse for this. Eleven year old kids should not even know what suicide is really about much less commit suicide over ” peer pressure”.

This here is a Mommy and Daddy problem-so lets all take note.

 

tj