A Way To Remember Daddy..

The last few times I have been out with my little baby girls who are not grown yet, just 5 & 10 years old, I have had constant thoughts about the power of the father daughter relationship and I wonder how I am really doing to build that foundation with my own daughters and how they will feel about us when they are grown. My boys are now 20 and 23 so those days are long over. I know where I stand and what I did right and where I came up short. Even so , those are boys. That is a whole different animal. The boys are more resilient when it comes to our relationship. Not quite as sensitive about mistakes I have made and seem to be able to focus on good times and remember what was really strong about our relationship and still is.

For example even with all my mistakes and problems when my boys were little, I still am very happy with how our relationship is today. They had to witness some not so pretty times in my life. The tail end of my treatment for addiction was occurring right in front of their eyes. They had to go through a divorce as toddlers those horrible times when I am dropping them off at mom’s house and they grab my ankle tight and scream ” I don’t want you to go” with fountains of tears pouring out of their little eyes. I remember more tear filled drives home alone during those times then not. I had to decide what I was going to do about the situation to try to preserve our future. The last thing I wanted was for them to get older and have their mom start rambling on about what a failure and addict I was when they were little.

So in that case I decided that there were two things I could do to minimize the potential for that since I could not erase the truth.The first thing I decided to do was as soon as they were old enough to understand I sat them down for a family meeting, just us. I poured out all the dirt. I told them of my struggles, how I was dealing with it and even the consequences I had suffered as a result the problems. I did not sugar coat anything but took full responsibility for it all.

It did not make anything go away, but looking back I was teaching them a valuable lesson about ownership, about humility and most of all about forgiveness. There were times they heard and saw things that a 4 year and 6-year-old should not see. After owning it all I asked them for forgiveness, and told them what my plan of action was to try to prevent that from occurring  again. To my surprise the response was better than I thought. I felt and still feel a sense of respect that I  earned from them, more so now that they are older for coming clean  and owning my own behavior.

I still wish they did not have to see me like I was at my lowest going to rehab and all that jazz. I was a sight for sore eyes. However I will say that to this day neither of them has ever brought it up or tried to use it against me. Better yet their mother could not do that either. I spoiled her plan to talk bad about me the rest of their lives, by talking bad about myself first. That took the wind out of her sails for that plan anyhow. The other thing I decided to do after the asking for forgiveness, was I decided to insert something unique, like a special thing that was just between us to replace the negative. I just wanted them to love me and know how very ,much I loved them. 

I began making a point of doing something I never experienced as a child, something to reassure them of my love for them even during the trials they had been through. I decide to go against the ” man grain” and be a super affectionate dad, and made a vow that every time I saw them or left them I would hug them, kiss them, and make them look me in the eye as I told them I loved them. All through middle and high school that’s how it was. I was not obnoxious about, you should know.

wp-1497731990208.

I did not cramp their style or embarrass them in front of their friends, I acted in a way that was appropriate for their ages. Instead of a full body hug and big kiss on the cheek in high school we had “code” for our ” I love You’s ” and our giant hugs.

In high school when I was around their friends or dropping them off at an event where kids could hear and see, we had this kind of standing  half- hug- half body bump  thing that basketball players were doing all the time to take the place of me on my knees with my arms wrapped around them hugging them. lol.

The ” I love you” became ” you too” . So when we were leaving each other there was a body bump and a “me too”.  To my great pleasure as they got older and out of high school our communicating that we loved each other did not fade, it got stronger. To this day every single time I talk to the boys on the phone we say the words. No matter where they are, out-of-state for the military, or my youngest son may be in any of the 50 states at any given time due to his career as a professional rodeo bull rider, at the conclusion of our call they always say ” Ok love you”  before they hang up. Always. It may not seem like a big deal but believe me after sitting across the table years before pouring my shame and problems out to them, I was not sure if they would want to even claim me as their dad.

Oh How Things Change With Girls!

1520_15082061700971902785752.jpeg1521_1508206181265797883731.jpeg

So I have these two little girls you know . I love them so very much and they are sweet girls. They are so agreeable with almost everything I say. I mean just the other day my 10-year-old agreed via a ” Pinky Promise”  that there will be ” No dates til 28!” What a sweetheart. I know she will stick to it too. I mean we all know little girls do not lie. Especially to their daddy. I am so relieved that I do not have to start going out on dates with her and any boy until she is 28! What a peace of mind to know that..

willie shot gun shell

So with the girls it is a different scenario because they are so very different then the boys. So very sensitive and so open to hurt in their heart. Ever since those girls were born into this world I have felt like those two are my actual heart , divided in two pieces in the form of a couple little girls. Everything that happens to them happens to me. Every time they feel pain, I do too. I try to avoid any extra pain for them as much as possible.

Lets just say it is a whole lot different then when the boys were young, they would almost weekly walk in the door from school or playing outside with a new injury. Sprained ankles, chipped teeth , I recall Jesse with two nose breaks before second grade. It never ended. I can picture hearing one of them yell from their room;

” Dad, my ankle is purple and swollen like 2x normal size and my little toe is broke”

My response? ” There is some ice in the cooler, did you do your homework yet?”

And Life With Girls Now….

Not so much with my girls. The other day after school my oldest was eating a sandwich and I guess she accidentally put a little pepper or onion or something she normally does not eat on it.  Not knowing this  I walked by the table and noticed her eyes were red so I stopped to find out what was going on.

But then when I noticed a tear drop coming from my angel’s eye   I lost it…

I was like ” Emily what is it just tell me, did some boy at school say something to you?

Just give me his name honey don’t you worry that pretty little face .. I’ll teach someone what its like when you make my daughter cry!

It did occur to me a little later that my responses to my sons back in the day varied slightly from how it goes with my daughter.

So yes there are major differences in the way dads react and think of the different ways of boys and girls. Even so I still carried on the tradition of the hug and kiss and ” I love you” each time we part ways and I will tell you this, If I forget once to say It as we part ways, my 10 year old will call me out on it. She does this by repeating what I should have said until I catch on and actually say it..like this

” umm dad? I love you Emmy”  then repeat and repeat until I say ” I love you Emmy” . You know what? I am proud that she reminds me. It means it means something to her. Something I started as a parent is actually turning out good! Even in the midst of storms and trials little things like making sure you have told your children you love them is so critical. it just does not happen enough , at least in my world.

Now before you think I am some kind of monster by the way I blew my son’s sprained ankle off but wa so concerned about  my daughter’s tear-you should know a few things before you start accusing me of favoritism with my sweet angels over the boys.

1- When I realized Jesse’s ankle was truly sprained or broke, I personally got him ice.  Also, I gave him an extra day to wash my truck as that was his day to do it. So you see I have a soft heart for all.

2, You did not see just how BIG of a tear was coming from Emily’s eye. You would have panicked too. Honestly if it was not for me taking her for ice cream and finishing her homework for her that night, she told me herself she would still be bawling! I had to do something.

Well, at least they all say they love me. That is worth it all.

So as I end this I want to share a thought I had a month or so ago during of those times I was just sitting at the park watching the girls play. It has not left me and I think I am going to do this not only for my children but possibly offer it as a service to families down the road who just like the idea. It is likely something you will immediately gravitate towards, or you may just shrug your shoulders and feel like ” whatever floats your boat” ….

I  truly think this idea would and could change and help a lot of people when the time comes in our lives when we will be forced to leave our children on this earth as we age out and expire into eternity. I know that I am for sure going to do it for my kids.

Over the years in my work, I have been involved in my share of family tragedies and deaths of parents, some just were old and died and some taken suddenly. The one thing I notice that is always present during these times is families talking to the siblings about how much their mom or dad loved them and cared about  them. Sadly,  I have sensed doubt in eyes of the children sometimes who left the last time with dad on bad terms, or maybe it just seemed like daddy like the older brother better so the younger sibling lives his life believing he was 2nd best son to his father.

Worse yet on occasion a sudden death of the father in the family will occur tight in the middle of a huge argument between two sides of the family and they are not on speaking terms. I have seen more than not at funerals or get together after a death children thinking back to their childhood days trying to think of some good thing to say about how much pop loved all the kids, as evidenced by the time he _______________ ( you fill in the blank)

The problem is often there just are not a lot of good memories fresh on your mind when an older man like a dad dies. Perhaps like my grandfather who loved me dearly and took me everywhere all the time while he was well, things changed a bit when illness set in. With Alzheimer’s or any sickness the elderly suffer from near end of life, you may hear your beloved father look you in the eye and tell you he has always thought of you as a jackass your entire life! What then?

Or as the daughter is trying to have a last conversaation with daddy in the nursing home before he passes away, maybe he will look at her and tell her she is a no good whore. That she only got married because she got ” Knocked up”!

You think I exaggerate? I am likely making light of the situaiton. In almost every single nursing home around the world, there are dads who are on their way out who have all nbut lost their minds. During the sibling last month seeing him alive they are more likely to hear what a dissappointment they have been or be cursed at than be told hwo much they are loved. So considering all these points and also considering what my girls would be thinking if I was taken to heaven suddenly? Howcan I be sure they will remember hjow proud I am of them and of their accomplishemnts? I cannot. But I could!

So here is the idea I am considering with a partner. We think it would be really neat if dads, or moms could call us up when they are in their golden years or maybe in some cases when their health is going south and they can make sure that when they can no longer express their love for their children and other loved ones ( or in  my case just in case something happened to me unexpectedly) .

We believe that children especially at anby age would benefit in a huge way after losing a parent to click a cd of their mom or dad telling them of their love for them and reminding them of some of the special times they had and try to encourage the family to remember the good stuff instead of only going through the mourning process with not much positive going on in that process.  One neat feature is that we would get all the contact information of the immediate family when we made the tape and ask the persons social worker, caregiver, pastor , or others to make us aware when a condition worsens for a patient, so we can be ready to share the tape with the family at just time.

Usually, as in the movie The Ultimate Gift with James Garner, any tapes after death are about wills and momey or who gets what. This often makes things even worse during an already sad time. For people like myself who just want my kids to be able to hear my voice and see my face again if something happened to me while I was young, this could be an even more powerful tool. When a child loses a parent unexpectedly there is an emotional and physical loss that is tremendous. No more tucking in or night time hugs or taking them to school or contact period.

To be able to put the tape in every day if need be for awhile for a 10 year old would be a huge comfort. To hear the same words in the same voice from your daddy telling you how proud he is and how much he loves them. In the cases of Christians the parent would emphasize the fact that eternity is awaiting all of them and eternity together is the long term plan. The hope something like this could provide a child wouldl be very helpful in my opinion. We all have seen people who have lost a loved one go and try and find something, anything to hold that reminds them of the loved one who died. That is evidence that there is a desire to be close and to be near to that loved one. What better way than to hear directly fromt them?

Anyhow, If anyone has any interest on being involved from a business stamdpoint, I would be open to talking to a private businessman or woman who would like to partner with me on this as I have several other responsibilities including the entire team at Dont Label My Kid! and all the projects we are working on, the blogs and magazine and all that needs continous effort that goes into these things.

I dont need any  contacts for dispensing the product and getting the word out as I am connected to hundreds of nursing and retirement homes where much of this would be focused on. I would be interested strictly in a partner as a silent partner / investor.

I hope you all consider what your childrens needs would be if something were to happen to you. As parents I know you would do anything to ease their pain. I know it is not pleasent to think about but it is reality. We are not promised tomorrow .

Look at it like fire insurance, you have to get it but hope you never need it.

Send any inquiries or feedback to tim@dontlabelmykid.com and if you are interested in partnering with usin the way I mentioned, you can call me on my cell at 386-675-7549.

God Bless everyone- Have a great week!

Tj

PTSD- How It Effects Soldiers As Bad Or Worse As Civilians…And A Great Story To See It In Movie Form.

By now everyone has heard of PTSD or Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Although a long time back it was a term reserved for the diagnosis of very severe patients who had been exposed to some extraordinary events. These days 6 years old get the diagnosis when a spanking they got has been labeled abuse and therefore they suffer from PTSD.

Today I watched a movie with Samuel Jackson and a few others that were all in combat together in Iraq. Unlike the war movies I have seen, this was one of the best mental health sides of the truth that I ever have seen. In this flick, it does not end when the 4 who were from the same area leave for home. It does not end until you see how each one chooses to handle their PTSD here at home, in the real world. If  you are a coach or counselor of any type you need to watch this movie.

I think it will change even the most seasoned therapists, as this movie is so absolutely transparent in each of the people’s lives it brings life in you a whole new meaning to what PTSD is really all about.

 

screenshot_20170829-163749-402564641.png

Home Of The Brave

If have any trouble getting on through the first link, I have posted a second to Tubitv ( 100% free to watch it there)

https://tubitv.com/movies/389507/home_of_the_brave

https://tubitv.com/home

 

 

Get Me Out Of My PTSD!

 

A LIST OF OBAMA’S ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS THE FIRST BLACK PRESIDENT OF THE USA

Even I must give credit where credit is due..

( Oh and btw, feel free to jump in and dispute these figures, I’ll admit I didn’t double check) so…umm my friends on that side, no comment on this and fair to call it true?)
http://www.americasfreedomfighters.com/2014/01/26/a-list-of-obamas-accomplishments-as-the-first-black-president-of-the-usa/?utm_source=Facebook&utm_medium=TFPP&utm_campaign=TFPP

100% True Funniest Parent Story I can Remember…About My Own Child.

My older son is 22 and a sharp shooter in the Army, full-time college student and full time worker. I am praying he never reads this, and am fairly confident he wont. He does not take much interest in my writing.. ( I know, I don’t get it either). For the purpose of this story I will call him ” stinky “. It takes place in a quiet southern town about 50 miles northwest of Orlando Fl. in about 1995. In a grocery store called Publix.

Stinky was 2 years old and riding on the kid part of the shopping cart, you know – the part where they just stare at you until something on the shelf catches their eye, they lunge for it, you swerve, they cry? Yeah that type deal. Well Stinky and I were at about the half way point of our shopping trip when I noticed a slight scent coming from the same vicinity that Stinky was sitting. At first I panicked of course but then as a new first time dad would do, I ignored it and reminded myself that I had out a ” pull up” on him right before we came in the store.

This was right when pull-ups had come out, and were a true Godsend, just in case. We went about another aisle down and I noticed the scent was getting stronger and I admit I began to worry a little. Not knowing what exactly to do in the middle of this giant store, I began to slow my roll and let the others pass me by while strategically heading to the diaper/wipes/paper towel isle. As I approached this isle, I happened to glance down at the newly waxed tiled floor of the grocery.

We got a problem.

I remember thinking to myself that I had not recalled seeing any little brown dots peppering the tiles before. I quickly grabbed the nearest bag of paper towels, ripped them open and leaned down, to wipe-the dots off the tiles around me. I remember going in reverse, and wiping up a few tiles behind us as well. It was then I realized that I had no idea this breadcrumb poop trail had been going on. I just remember ripping through the paper towels and making sure I grabbed ” Bounty ” the “quicker picker upper”. Within seconds I found myself going into a kneeling position, one hand on the cart ( pulling backwards) and one hand full of paper towels wiping poop drops as I went backwards dodging other shoppers and acting as if I was looking for my contact or something.

Within a minute I was zipping back at high rate of speed, weaving and bobbing between other shoppers. I was good. So good that within about 4 minutes and 2 rolls of Bounty, I had reached the end of the trail..finally. I wiped up the last splatter and casually made my way to the men’s room. You see, new parent or not, I am a smart cookie. I remembered to bring an emergency outfit and pull-up for such a time as this. I am not bragging here, but within 5 minutes my boy and I were calmly exiting the men’s room as if nothing had gone down..er, well you get it .

As I calmed down we shopped some more, and finally decided we had all we needed. I gave myself a little mental pat on the back for handling it as well as I did. We rolled up to the checkout counter and waited our turn. I think I was playing peek a boo or something as we waited. Heck I thought, nobody needs to know about this one. It was our little secret. So finally the line died down, and we pulled up and began unloading our groceries. The checkout girl was kind enough to help and we began to toss things on the belt. About 2 minutes into it, I noticed the girl making a funny face and she began to cough. Not the ” I have a cold ” cough, but a sickly and frowning face type of cough. Within a minute she began to let out a quiet but audible shriek and then said then she said these words ” What is that smell?”

I’m cool – I mean I cleaned it all up. I thought.

As it turns out, dad forgot to check one spot- the spot directly below the kid’s poop shoot in the cart. As it turns out I guess the girl happened to pullout a package of ground beef from directly below Stinky. The package had little brown droppings on it. Before I could get her attention, she was on the store loudspeaker begging for assistance on isle 4. It went something like ” clean up on isle 4 ” and by the time she had run her big mouth all over the speaker, a parade of bag boys, and a few managers had made their way up to see and smell what went on.

I remember a collective ” ooh gross ” from the customers in line behind me while scattering to another line, me begging to pay the bill, and stinky just smiling through it all. What started as a proud daddy and son shopping day,  ended as a walk of shame to the parking lot in slow motion. A group of bag boys were sent to follow us and retrieve the cart so they could rinse and scrub it. I humbly put Stinky in his car seat and we drove off into the moon-light.

To this day I cannot eat raisinets or milk-duds. I know, I know its gross.

tj

Alternative Solutions 4 Health

http://www.alternativesolutions4health.info/

 

Its Friday- Time For- ‘Mike’s Corner’

Did you know that lower back pain (which is a worldwide complaint) most times is pain referred from another part of the body and has nothing to do with the back?  Usually it is a result of the Occipital bone being out. Since the Occipital bone is a part of the brain, chiropractor cannot usually adjust it. However there are 2 herbs that each have a frequency which will cause it to go back in very quickly.

Contact Mike for your personalized evaluation-

silverwood08@gmail.com

2017 Series -Getting Through The Dark Times; Faith It ‘Til Ya Make It!

 

In the last 4 years I have written about many topics from parenting to depression, addiction to PTSD, medication, suicide, therapy  and so much more. It seems like a lot but as I have always said, I don’t speak on anything that I haven’t lived through personally or at the very least studied professionally. In the beginning I thought writing about so many different types of issues would make it seem like life is filled with nothing but bad stuff. However  I learned two important things in the last four years; I am not alone, and people need to hear from others who can relate.

So far I have mostly  discussed all the different types of problems and medical mental health struggles and family issues that exist. And there’s plenty to discuss no doubt. . Up until now, I have not really delved into how we deal with these issues as we go through these dark trials. Its imperative that we have some way of staying grounded during these times we walk  through the valley.

 It’s very important that we have some sort of an anchor to keep us from drifting too far away from reality when we feel so lost in such darkness, and with so few friends. As most of you have understood, if I shared my life experiences, some of these times are gone through very much alone and there are not many people around that can relate. Unless you really search. And most of the time we don’t feel like searching for anything when we’re barely able to wake up every day and get dressed. Having been through very traumatic times that caused depression, and nightmares and loneliness and sometimes the inability to function normally. I can understand the darkness that prevails if we allow it to.

 There’s a few things in my life that I can honestly say, are the only reasons that I am here today, both physically and mentally spiritually and emotionally. I know that if it took those things to keep me saying then all of you also had to have some way that you’ve coped something that held you together. and some? To that you’ve used to make it to the point, we are able to even write about it today on a blog. The truth is professionally I’ve seen that it isn’t a very high percentage of us that are able to make it even this far- in fact we are a  very blessed group of people to have come through what we have and able to share it with other people. Speaking of sharing it with other people that is a critical piece in healing. It isnt always about us -the spotlight can’t always be on us even in our dark times and the truth is some of the ways out of these dark times the very quickest are by reaching out to others and pulling them up with the knowledge we have.

Sometimes when you need a friend the most you got to go and be a friend to someone. . Sometimes when you need encouragement the most you need to go and encourage someone. And even sometimes when you need financial help, you need to reach out to someone who you know could use what little bit you have and help them.. The point is as tempting as it is when we are in these dark times, the worst thing we can do is send out invitations for a pity party. I have always found some good advice from a guy that sings a song full of truth abut these times. I would like to share this song with you and I’ve shared the one with lyrics so you can read along… Please take 3:38 minutes out and watch it…at the end of this post. It may just resonate with you somehow…( you may have to click on it to play it)

So as I kick off the on going series on how we have made it to the point we are, I would ask that you all share any advice that you have. I shared all the problems lol- now I need help with looking at many solutions. I am leaving this wide open, and welcome any guest posts on the topic. Like I said – the more you share the more therapeutic it is.

So lets see where this goes y’all

If You’re Going Through Hell..

Mike”s Corner- Unusual Facts About Your Health!

Did you know that there are only two eye colors blue and brown. Colors of green and gray or hazel are all shades affected by the toxins build up in your body. As a matter of fact with a good cleansing the colors will be restored to blue!

Anyone who has suffered from what they call acid reflux really has what’s called a hiatal hernia. This can be cured permanently with a simple adjustment.

For personalized health consultation with your particular health issue contact Mike at silverwood08@gmail.com

Visit his website –

www.alternativesolutions4health.com

The Butcher Is Slaughtering Himself- What Have We Done To Our Country? Our World?

I had forgotten why I discontinued watching television about 2 years ago until yesterday when I glanced at some news while I was out running errands. It is so discouraging and depressing not to mention embarrassing to see what we as a society have come to tolerate to accept and sacrifice ethically morally and spiritually. It’s clear that as a whole this country is so confused about its own identity and yet the numbers of people seeking the truth or seeking out the manual for a living (the Holy Bible) decreases all the time according to statistics.

I don’t know how you operate but in my world if something isn’t working and I can’t fix it I usually as a last resort at least go to the manual. Sure I should have done it at first but I’m not like that so I don’t. So occasionally I’ll spend a lot of wasted effort on things I could have save time on by going directly to the manual. So we have clearly failed in what we have tried to accomplish in this world in this United States of America yet we refuse to go to the manual. The only reason I can think of is selfishness not wanting accountability and a spiritual battle that has taking this country by the throat and threatened with a sword of our enemy to back off from goodness and righteousness.

So no matter what you have subscribed to in the past and no matter what you grew up with if your life is not going well and you see around you what I see-  maybe its time we look at the manual and see what it says. To my knowledge to this day not one single word has ever been found to return void.

And by the way I didn’t write it so please don’t shoot the messenger!  The bottom line is that nobody’s ever disproved the bible and every single word in that is a promise that it will never come back void- yet so many are afraid to touch or open it.  I think that is evidence of itself that we all know the truth deep down inside. If my neighbor hung Superman signs all over his house and in his yard put up Superman posts it wouldn’t bother me a bit I realize who Superman is and what Superman is not. If my neighbor put up crosses and pictures of Christ all over his house and yard and it irritated me that would raise some questions because if I really knew it was no existing being or no God of the universe or no Jesus Christ of Nazareth exists,  it wouldn’t affect me just like Superman wouldn’t. Give that some thought for a minute. Why do some get that irritated feeling in their gut at the name of JESUS? Does this make you angry- JESUS! JESUS! JESUS!

If so, why?

People spending millions of dollars to take down a cross or hide bibles in school classes just so they don’t have to hear or see about Jesus Christ? They have become more tolerant of cults that support things like raping children, sharia law and chopping off arms and vaginal mutilation for young girls.  Makes no sense does it?

crosd

I mean how would you look at me if I made the news for spending millions and protesting in the streets how offended I am by my neighbors Superman gear? You would think I should be locked up somewhere, right? LOL!

Its like a 3rd grader plugging his ears when he doesn’t want to hear the answer the way he wanted the adult to say it. Its very sad and sometimes I’m ashamed and embarrassed for our own kind. Its sad as we should be leading the way in sharing good news and hope with people.

We act like the stubborn husband who refuses to ask directions, all the while his wife is holding a road map in one hand and a GPS in another. In this case God is holding out His Word, in His hands to us..

No matter what the reason we have gotten off  track-God made us a blessed country by surrendering and submitting to His name. Now we have withdrawn from doing this corporately, and we see the handiwork of our own decisions.

My question is why is everyone refusing to test it out? Maybe its time we ” rebelled ” against the world system we now are stuck in of hatred, violence, and the removal ( in our hearts) of surrendering as one nation under GOD?

I think its worth a shot!

tj

ALL BETS- WOULD BE ON UNIT LOCKDOWN BY NOW HAD SHE WON & FACED REAL PRESSURE..

About

Source: About

Health Trivia!Get Ready To Be Shocked?.

http://www.alternativesolutions4health.info/facts/

Mike Carey is the owner of alternativesolutions4health- and our new partner . 

Since meeting him I have never ceased to be amazed  at the new things I learn . I had to share this quick fact sheet of things he shares on his site …

tj

(*today’s randomly selected letters may offend some as they involve politics/religion)

 

Deer don’t Label Mi KiDD

I sawed na post in which youd made fun of one a are fine W.Virginia teachers  who wore a TRUCK FUMP Tee to skool.. She has the righst to her politics opinion.

I beeleve you employed she was-

1-mentally challenged,

2-toothles

3-a reason for birt control,

4-chewed tobacco (so?)

5- even that since she had no children -she must be able to “out run her brother“- what kind of stupid coment is that? All because she hates Trump? Wow. You are sumething else. That’s out of line.

West Virginia Mountain MaMa

 

West Virginia Obama Mama

Bubba

 


Dear Bubba-

As much as I dislike Obama and Hillary and dummocrats, you will never hear me make any kind of statements so vile and ugly about politics.  I would not say those type things at all ( unless they were facts and true) because I do not gossip.

Not one of those comments had to do with politics, I was just commenting on her being from West Virginia. I never mentioned anything about children at all. I may, possibly inadvertently repeated a totally inappropriate joke ( i don’t think its funny) that some guy said -about

“what do you call a girl from west virginia who can outrun her brother? A virgin. ”

But again no mention of children that’s lies.

tj

 


 

Hey DLMK!

My name is mohammed m. mohaamed.,

 

I read your sad post about we muslims ” kill people and that we cause division and are confused ourselves. You are uneducated on my religion. My little son mohammed jr. knows more then you. His little sister Muhammed could read the koran to you and right before I sold her she recited the entire book to me by memory. Pretty good for 7 years old. If we kill, it is in peace as our profit mohammed says to. Maybe if you spent some time with us you would also learn how to live a peaceful life.

The only downside at all is our name book only has 2 names in it at we have for our own automatic weapons. That’s a small price to pay for peace.You say I am confused? Man oh man if my wife was in town to watch little m&m and  I didn’t have a few goats waiting I will show you some confusion

.

goat man

You Americans are stupid. You don’t know how to learn and use resources.

obamaosama

These days most 14 year old muslim boys already have their pilots license and just to mock your stupidity we had you pay for several shipments of arms thru our fine brother B. Hussein Obama’s generous donation of 3 BILLION dollars for Ramadan.  Its comical you people don’t know what pleasure is. I must now go tend my flock but we will talk again..

Signed

M&M

 


 

Dear M&M ,

I only quoted from your koran.  I apologize for offending you . Perhaps if I spent some with your people in the mosque ( do I have to check my AR at the door?) it would help.

Maybe I will see more clearly the link between the slaughters of your daughters, the dismembering of your wives, bartering your 6 year old’s off to 50 year old’s for marriage

Maybe my reward will be to reveal to me why the kids all must get pilot licenses used to crash planes not fly them…

Let me be clear on one thing.

No matter what- under any circumstances- at any time- ever- do I want t know ANYTHING about you all and your animals.-  I refuse to even think about why you and your goats…well anyways my wife leaves town too….. but the boys round here watch football during those times, go fishing, hunting…we like the humans in these parts…but hey if allah is pleased thats all that matters right? You need a check up from the neck up.

Screenshot_20170422-093111

As you see I did not post the 8 pictures of your ” girls” or whatever you call them but i did post just one as evidence all the readers that you sent this to me, and you are the one with the business idea – and I don’t appreciate offensive pictures your pleasure toys being sent here. Its repulsive. How would you like it if I sent you pix of beautiful naked women? Repulsed correct? Yes i know. So give me the same courtesy.

I think you and your new idea of putting 1000 goats under an air conditioned roof and serving drinks is nuts. That is just an undercover Muslim Strip Club. And Please do not ever use the term ” deep goat” ever again. You see I deleted all 14 times you said that in this letter.. I recommend making a way for your wife to be home more, although its no secret that the majority of non-goatees say you all purposely send your wives away all the time. That’s even more sick.

You are encouraging this Baaaaaad behavior.

tj

 A Little About Me. The Guy Behind Don’t Label My Kid!- Tj -Up Close And Personal..**sorry for issues with link will have fixed in a few hours. ..

 

Well, I thought after 4 years maybe I should introduce myself… to my ” inner circle”.

 What you are about to read is all true folks- except for some rumor about the home in the background of the picture of my wife and I -being my ” Guest House” – Right… On a Social Workers salary? Not!…

Its actually just our own humble abode. We cannot afford ” guest houses”.

Ok, alright – just got a” friendly” nudge from my wife (ouch) to tell the ” whole ” truth. So It’s actually the Biltmore Hotel, and ” technically speaking” we used our life savings to spend 2 nights there 12 years ago…   Whats the big diff?

Some people are just dream-killers.

Anyhow this really is my story in a snapshot…    ..

http://dontlabelmykid.com/Home.html

Are You Staying Or Going….                                I Dare You To Move..

                                            Are You Staying ? Or Our You Going?

 

 

 

 

 

I am about to out into words a post that quite possibly could rank to me at least in the top 3 posts I have written here . I have posted 500+.  200 or so are on the light side, unrelated to my experiences in abuse, addiction, a family peppered with suicide, depression, violence, more depression and on it goes. I suffered through many , many days, weeks and even months crawling emotionally and spiritually  towards some imaginary finish line that I could not see.

Now even though I have enough in my mind and to fill many pages here, and planned on taking my time, just 30 minutes ago that plan was scrapped. Oh not for lack of stories good and sad, spiritual journeys that have been so unreal to some that they question why I maintain any faith at all in ” God” – much less a stronger faith then ever..(and those are my Christian friends!)

Nope, just I was preparing to start this post, something just drew me to glance at the new posts on reader before I started. Well,  just like most details in my life, this was no accident at all. Other than a little bump to my pride I am good with it now.. lol

 

A new friend , fellow blogger and gifted writer named Mehul Singla  just rearranged my plan 100% and he has no clue-yet !..He just today pushed some great “6 letter posts” out and asked for feedback. I gave him my 2 cents. A few minutes later I realized I was giving us both advice. So here is the new plan. I will spare you 30 minutes of sad stories and how my life has taken its odd turns- ONLY if you promise to do 2 things.

1- After you read this blip I am almost done with please watch this video. One of my very favorite singers in the world..Jon Foreman of  Switchfoot.

Jon has touched my life for 25 years, many by this very song.  One time I recall laying on the floor of a rehab at 29 withdrawing from medications, crying out for anyone to listen-when nobody believed in me anymore. Another maybe 3 years later when began to battle major depression while being used as a guniea pig. About 2 dozen medications later I got off them all- but not before the car wreck, then being sucker punched by a guy with brass knuckles which aside from 50 stitches in my eye socket cost me much memory.

I wont get into really bad stuff like my bone disease, failed hip replacement at 44 and 6 surgeries after that leaving my famiy homeless…

So watch it- Thats #1

 

Here is THEE point- Whatever your hole, your pit, your paralyzing loss, pain, or whatever…Jon’s cry to me in this song has always been the same- ” I Dare You To Move”-

If you google ” What is the song Dare You To Move about- Jon gives an overview of why, when, how that song just became…and how in the very hardest most tragic times, it was the answer to this question that in many ways determined his destiny on earth..as it does mine each day..

To my atheist, agnostic, not sure yet- tree huggers, beer chuggers and all of y’all -lol you know I love you all the same…but an interesting piece of trivia- Switchfoot is NOT a ” Christian” band… I have seen them 3x in person and their message is always the same-

  • a message of hope and healing. ( I even smoked a Newport at a concert one time)

I know, I know exactly what you are thinking… “Tj you live on the edge”-

Well, I have calmed down some ok?

(Now secretly, I think thats just what they are called to do- UNBEAT some people who have been bible thumped to near death -lol)

Just to encourage people and live it too..

#2 – It can be just between you and you – you and God- you and a palm tree- doesnt matter- but do this- Identify you “mud puddle.” To me my mud puddles are; one part dirt from our past, 1 part self pity,  1 part fear of what lies ahead if you DO move on and 1 part liking attention we get from being ” muddy” all the time…lol

I am sorry its just the language I use! Work with me…

 

Lastly- although this can be private…often when we do begin to identifythese things, we need someone or people to reach out to,…if you find yourself with a good idea of what your puddle of choice is, do not hesitate to email me in 100% certainty of absolute confidentiality. I have learned who to know and trust in my 25  years in social work..whether immediate counseling from a trusted private and free service to the most elaborate fancy shmancy beachsie rehab where you get your own laptop with your yogurt and personak trainer all in strict confidence. Remember, I have already been where most of you have, or need to be when it comes to identifying our areas of need. Its an everyday thing for me…

peace2you

tj

 

Accidental Overdose…( But Who’s Accident)

Over and over in the media we hear and see it. The constant reminder of the current drug epidemic in our world. Its true, we have a huge problem – especially in the area of opiates and heroin. Here is the question that rolls through my mind whenever I read one of the  ” young man  dies from apparent overdose” headlines; Who caused the accident? Are so many people who use drugs today so low functioning that they ” accidentally ” shoot up 3x too much – or take 10 more pills then they know is lethal? I doubt it.

So what could it be? I ll tell you in a minute. First let me give you an example of another scenario. I know of a guy who came home from the hospital after some major surgery. The first night home he reached for his prescribed medicines. There was a narcotic pain killer, an anti-inflammatory, a sleep aide ( ambien, I believe) , blood thinners, and 1-2 other insignificant ones. He took his medicine as prescribed.

Within 4 hours he was outside ( 2:30am) -yard hopping, hiding behind big areas of grass ( he called them bunkers), lying on his stomach and ” defending his country – so he thought. Hours later when the ” war” was over he went to the local 7-11 where he was sure the secret service planned to pick him up ( undercover) to take him to see President Bush, who was going to present him an award for outstanding bravery. It gets even crazier but I think you all get the point. Plus, I don’t want anyone to figure out that the man in the story is me..

In my case the doctor called it a  ” rare drug interaction ” and switched my medications.

Here is my point; if I had been found dead, or God forbid committed a crime during that ” experience” there is no question that the headline would have read something like this ” man on drugs goes on war rampage” or ” man checked into psychiatric unit after apparent drug overdose”. You get the point.

Its way too easy for doctors or law enforcement to lead the public to false conclusions to protect what may incriminate them…

tj