I gave up decades ago even sharing with close friends the goings on in my life. Why? Simple; They didnt believe me, or simply couldn’t process the idea that these occurrences would be continuous in one person’s life.
Some of the incidents in our family are common like divorce, diseases, abuse and even our tragic times like my brothers suicide and lots of death in general.
I quickly learned that most things are better left to the family. However , sometimes I just got to let it out! Thats where blogging has been therapeutic for me. Last week or so I mentioned I was exhausted from keeping on top of the pedo-priest deal but happy that somebody busted it wide open. The official in Pennsylvania just blew it out of the water with his huge announcement in August.
We needed a break like that.
Thank God most states are following suit and investigating seriously the huge racket of pedophilia in the church.
But, today I’m sharing a different side of things that I suspect many of you can relate to in your own way.
Battling a group of freaks as powerful and wealthy and nasty as some of Catholic church can be dangerous. I have been in this field long enough to know when you ruffle feathers, you better prepare for war, both *spiritually and naturally.
( *shout out to my atheist friends btw..just ignore that ” spiritual” reference..lol you all know I love ya..)
Since the year I really started digging my heals in the whole thing I have been attacked from so many directions its hard to keep up. It becomes a way of life. You may lose friends, family and even spouses over it.
(I mean thats what I hear)
But as many of of you all know, when you just know in your knower that you cannot be silent about an issue…you cannot back down…its no longer a choice.
For me it was letting innocent kids become suicidal due to the sick pleasures of thousands of perverts in the church- I have no choice.
Recently as I was preparing to gather some documents for reporters off my email and files would you believe just coincidentally ( yeah right) I found myself totally locked out of my email, files and somehow at the same time my cellphone carrier ” accidently”did a FACTORY RESET on my cell!!!
If you dont know what that is, it basically means all the info and documents on your phone go bye – bye. For good.
Since I couldn’t get access to my cell phone now I was locked out of- I wasn’t able to reset my password for my Gmail because Google requires you to have the current phone number and get a text on it which means I was completely locked out and still am of all the documents I had. Fortunately this blog has been a lifesaver in that area because I posted almost all the things I had … statements, emails from officials etc…
I posted most on this blog so they’re all public anyway.
Whatever was behind that – it didn’t work – but it sure was stressful and still is stressful.
By the way I am well aware I’m not the only person that goes through times like this and I know that people have things even worse much worse than I do, I’m not here to claim I’ve got the toughest life I’m sure many of you can relate in your own way to what I’m saying.
So just as I was kind of catching my breath after that incident.. Yesterday brought to surface an entirely different issue from an angle I never expected ..
My mother didn’t feel good and she’s always feeling good but I knew something was wrong and insisted she go to the ER. as it turns out I was overreacting it was just a heart attack.
She only had a heart attack. Of course to my mom it’s like it’s no big deal “I just had a little heart attack they put a stent in and I’ll be okay and home in a few days”
” By the way son did you remember to take the recycle bin out?”
Me-” Yes momma, I got all 4 plastic milk containers in the bin”
It’s driving me crazy…and that’s not a very long trip in my state of mind right now LOL.
I watched the movie called Flawless the other day with Demi Moore and Michael Caine, during the movie they were having a conversation about how nothing worth doing is ever about the money and it struck a chord with me. It is very true.
The last decade or so life has seemed almost unbearable in so many different aspects and yet there’s no turning back.
I think many many people reading this can understand that- whatever your journey and your battle has been, so just keep your eye on the prize and never never never never give up- and never count on anybody else to lift you up and push you and motivate you while your surpassing anything they’ve ever attempted.
Well they are calling me back to my unit now- so gotta go.