When Your “Friends” Forsake You

I have been hearing a lot recently about how people have thought they had great friends and are discovering that the friendship is very one-sided. We all have these types of people who are in and out of our lives. You may be reading this, and you are disheartened. That friend who meant the world to you now acts like you don’t exist. I would like to share with you some things God taught me as people exited my life.

  • Some people are toxic and need to go. They are they to drain your energy and pull you down so they can feel better. Let them go while praying that they will see how self-centered they truly are and become selfless.
  • Some people are only meant to be in your life for a season. They will serve a purpose in your life for a brief time and move on. You and I have to learn how to understand these seasons and purposes and accept God’s timing for their exodus.
  • Some people must go because they are unintentionally keeping you from your purpose. This has been the case with many who have exited my life in the last few years. I cherished some friendships and put people on pedestals. I’m not saying that there is anything wrong with these people, but I would not be on the path I am today had I continue to walk with them. Their exodus from my life ultimately led me to greater compassion and understanding for those who are hurting. I would have never stepped out to start Overcomers Church and would have been sitting safely within a denominational comfort zone feeling like a fish out of water.

I discovered that the ones who stayed love me despite the different path I have taken. I have received such encouragement from them. We may not see eye to eye philosophically, but those who love you will be there through disagreements and all.

The Bible has many great things to say about friends. My favorite is this: “Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends” (John‬ ‭15:13‬ ‭NKJV). When a friend will go through the fire with you and sacrifice anything for you, you know you have a true friend. I am glad to tell you today that the greatest Friend you will ever have is Jesus Christ. Others will betray you; He will never forsake you.‬‬

Author: Matthew Winters (The Comeback Pastor)

Born and raised in Portsmouth, VA, I eventually landed in upstate SC because when God calls I move. I gave my life to Christ in 1987 and surrendered to the call to ministry in 1997. I am a three-time graduate from Liberty University and Theological Seminary: BS in Religion (2003), the MA in Religion (Leadership concentration - 2006), and the Master of Divinity (Pastoral Ministries - 2013). I have served as a worship leader and senior pastor in Virginia, North Carolina, South Carolina, and Georgia since 1996. After experiencing a divorce, God graciously gave me my wife, Jennifer, whom I married in September 2015. Between the two of us, we have 6 children. I am the Lead/Founding Pastor of Overcomers Church in Walhalla, SC, a church plant that is helping those who have been overcome by life to become Overcomers in Christ. Jennifer and I both love people and long to see them enter into a relationship with Christ and walk in the power of His Spirit. I pray that these thoughts I share will challenge and inspire you to greater heights and deeper depths for the glory of Christ.

4 thoughts on “When Your “Friends” Forsake You”

  1. My mom is going through this right now. She’s been caring for her mother 5 years. What started out as terminal hospice care has turned into long-term care and a lot of her friends have left her in the dust. It’s opened my eyes to how we need to be more careful and intentional toward people who may need us.

      1. Indeed! It breaks my heart. My dad has worked as a hospice RN for years, so I’m familiar with it, but I expected more from the Christians whom she has known for decades. The thing I have to remember is that they are people and, like me, sometimes get too caught up in their own lives, forgetting those who have need of them.

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