When Something Bad Happens in a Friend’s Life

I have been on the inside of the church scene for over 20 years. I know how people react when certain things happen within families in the church. A dating couple’s sexual encounters are made obvious when the lady becomes pregnant. A person’s criminal behavior becomes obvious when it hits the newspaper. Rumors are accepted as truth, facts are exaggerated, and the list goes on.

How do we handle that? Make it a topic of conversation at work? In our Sunday School classes? I must admit that it is a bit awkward. I often avoided the issue because I did not want to embarrass the family affected. Now that I have experienced a few things, I think I would have appreciated that someone tried to make sure I had emotional support through a difficult time. Now is not the time to isolate and ostracize those who have no control over the decisions their spouses, children, or siblings make. We can take the self-righteous route and say that it was bad parenting, but even the best of parents have kids who have premarital sex, get DUIs, and get locked up for domestic violence. No one is exempt.

I know it can often be uncomfortable to us because we do not know what to say. From personal experience, the people that ministered to me most were those who hugged me and told me they loved me without wanting to rehearse the details.

If a friend or someone you know is facing an uncomfortable situation, now is the time to reach out in love. They need your love and compassion more than you realize.

Author: Matthew Winters (The Comeback Pastor)

Born and raised in Portsmouth, VA, I eventually landed in upstate SC because when God calls I move. I gave my life to Christ in 1987 and surrendered to the call to ministry in 1997. I am a three-time graduate from Liberty University and Theological Seminary: BS in Religion (2003), the MA in Religion (Leadership concentration - 2006), and the Master of Divinity (Pastoral Ministries - 2013). I have served as a worship leader and senior pastor in Virginia, North Carolina, South Carolina, and Georgia since 1996. After experiencing a divorce, God graciously gave me my wife, Jennifer, whom I married in September 2015. Between the two of us, we have 6 children. I am the Lead/Founding Pastor of Overcomers Church in Walhalla, SC, a church plant that is helping those who have been overcome by life to become Overcomers in Christ. Jennifer and I both love people and long to see them enter into a relationship with Christ and walk in the power of His Spirit. I pray that these thoughts I share will challenge and inspire you to greater heights and deeper depths for the glory of Christ.

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