We all think we have a hold on what we need to do in life to have a sense of success. To say we are doing well, that we have arrived in this game called life. We all think this until another new study comes out that tells us that in order to be successful you must know the 7 keys to success. We must have a working knowledge of the 5 habits of highly successful people. Of course if you don’t know the 6 things every man needs to know about a woman you are lost as well.
What surprises me the most about the world we live in is the way people look to others to tell them if they should be happy or not. We actually read things to help us determine whether or not we are feeling ok or whether or not we need to seek help. I hear more and more people saying things like ” is that normal ” when referring to something they like or they think. People are so good at looking to others to find out if they should be ok or not.
So what should we do when we are seeking to know how we feel in our life? Should we compare how others are doing and see if they are happy, sad or indifferent then make a choice to act the same way? Should we read up on all the latest books on how to feel great and have confidence? You know that if someone wrote a book on feeling great, they likely didn’t feel that great at one time in their life. You know if someone is writing a book on how to have self confidence they once were insecure, right? But we don’t dig that deep because we are too interested in how to be in line with what the rest of people are doing and saying about how we should feel.
The most freedom one can have from this type of bondage is too be secure enough in ourselves to enjoy our life just the way it is. We need to enjoy each moment and not be concerned with whether or not our current feelings match with everyone else’s. If we can learn to find the good in each situation we are in, instead of trying to find a ” good ” situation to be in we will experience true peace in our lives. If we wait for everything to line up in our lives perfectly we will never have any peace because they rarely do. The secret to getting over this problem is to slow things down to what we are doing right now and to look for some good things in it.
Don’t get caught in the trap of waiting for things to reach a certain place to enjoy them. As a parent, I recall a time when my children were very young and it was diapers and feeding. I waited for the time they could wear underwear and feed themselves. When it did occur, I began to imagine what it would be like when they could take themselves to their own appointments and sporting events. Now that they are older I find myself thinking of how great it was when they needed me more! We do this in so many areas of our lives that we miss the journey because we wait for the destination. We don’t take time to enjoy what is in front of us because the media has told us that we will not have true enjoyment until we get something else.
I decided long ago to discipline myself and pay attention to what is right in front of me and quit thinking that it was something ahead that was going to give me peace. I have found that the world will keep on turning even of I stop to enjoy what I am doing right now. As a matter of fact this is how I began to stop thinking about football during church- and now I listen to the sermon instead. No matter what you are doing take time to enjoy it because what you are waiting for likely will not live up to the hype anyhow. Live in the now!
Don’t Label My Kid!
Wow- I am super excited to see what has been going on with Don’t Label My Kid! in the last few weeks! We have a network of 30+ professionals and growing every day in the mental health industry that have committed their service and time in some way to make this project a reality nationwide!
Thanks to Kenneth Davis for the logo design! Awesome!
Oh and by the way, our radio debut is tomorrow …yes radio! Check out the link to the interview on the web radio show! Great things are happening here! If you are not on board but wish to be-just email firstname.lastname@example.org and let us know what you can bring to it, and we will figure the rest out! This is the ground floor. If you are in now, you will be a part of what happens down the road! This is the time to get on board. We have doctors, therapists. lawyers, grant-writers, business people and all kinds in the network already!
We need bloggers, writers, marketing and publicity people and more!
Here is the link to our radio talk show host! Our first interview !
Don’t Label My Kid!
I have been around for awhile now, been a parent for 20 years or so. I like to think I have tested and tried most of the good parenting techniques. Sometimes I even feel a sense of accomplishment at how I did in some areas. I truly understand why different people use different parenting styles. I didn’t say I always condone the styles, but I think I get why people do what they do. It is actually very similar to the view I have on addiction. I also feel I understand why people use drugs, alcohol to mask pain and for other reasons. I cannot say I think that self medication is the best solution, but I really do get it, when it comes to the why of it all, maybe that’s because I have been there myself.
There is one style of parenting that I will never understand. The parenting style where the dad goes to his son’s football games, scolds his son when he is not perfect, yells at him in front of his friends, and acts like his life depends on whether this pee wee football game is won by his 10 year old son. This dad is clearly insecure, was likely picked on as a kid, and maybe stunk up the football field as a child. He is selfish and considers not the lifelong consequences of his verbal abuse of his own child. He takes no thought at the idea that maybe it is he who is the loser for treating another human being like this. He does not consider the fact that he is using a 10 year old to validate his sorry feelings about being a loser himself as a child. This dad is ruthless.
You will know this dad by his loud and harsh voice tone after each fail his son has. He can easily be spotted by looking for the 10 year old who has a red face, and tears falling down his cheek as he looks embarrassed by his father’s actions. Fearful, the boy continues to listen and nod to agree with his father at any cost just to avoid any more shame. This arrogant and selfish dad gets off by venting his own insecurities on his son, who he knows is too young and vulnerable to fight back. He takes advantage of the fact that his own flesh and blood has failed and capitalizes on his weakness in this time. This dad is all too common today and should never be allowed to parent, or even speak to a child. Finally, if this dad wants to call anyone a loser, and get his jollys by hurting others, perhaps he should start by looking in the mirror where the real loser stands.
Stand up to bullying parents. That’s abuse and unacceptable.