Marriage- Tell Her You Love Her- Then Love Her!

As a parent and a person living in this crazy busy world with crazy schedules it is so easy to get too busy to tell the people you love that you in fact do love them. Even more important is to show them that you love them. I have been a parent for many years and a foster parent for years and lived with over 40 teenagers and worked with hundreds and hundreds of kids in a family model setting such as Father Flanagan’s Boys and Girls Town. I have learned the value of telling your kids they are special and making sure they know they are loved. I have learned how to hug and hold and make them feel like they are special. I really think dad’s want their kid’s to feel loved and although they may have a hard time expressing their love in effective ways I think deep down inside the desire is there.

The thing that has seemed to be more difficult today is for men to learn the love language that they need to know in order to make their wives feel loved. To make the woman who works so very hard to keep that family together in so many ways feel special and loved. I myself have really missed the mark on this many times and thought it would be good for me to encourage all men in particular to commit with me to do this for our women. I am urging all men to make it as much a priority for our wives to be loved as it is for the television and jobs to be loved. I am calling on all men to man up with me and make that woman in your life the number one priority in your life as far as human relationships go. 

The woman is the one who holds things together for the family. She does those things that the man does not or cannot and does it without complaining. The woman in our lives has a direct affect on our relationship to our children. She nurtures and heals, calms and kisses and takes care of so many things we men take for granted. It is critical that they get their cup refilled once in awhile in order to carry on. They get weary and tired. They lose hope and enjoyment when their man is not loving them by protecting them and lifting them up, by not caring for their needs and listening when they need us to listen. We men often are quick to dismiss the cries of the woman who is lonely and hurting-the wife who is screaming for her husband to be the man that she was dreaming of when you asked her to marry you. 

I am not talking about just telling her you love her, but showing her you love her. Put her first before other things. Make her know she is the queen of your heart and nobody and nothing could ever change that. Put her needs in front of yours and do the right thing by sacrificing as much time or effort is needed to make her know without a doubt that she is loved. Men, lets be an example for our children and show them what a real man does and how a real man acts towards his wife. They treat their wives with dignity and respect and safeguard them from the hurtful things in this world. They are slow to anger and quick to forgive. They lead by tender example and don’t abuse their leadership role in the house. They will lay down their lives in a second for their woman and make her feel as if she is the only woman in the entire world, period.

If you have ever been less than a solid man for your wife this is a time to step up and commit to making the rest of your life the best of your life. It will make your wife feel special and your kids feel safe. It will put a smile on a beautiful face that hasn’t been able to crack one in months or years. It may just give her the hope she needs to carry on the wonderful job she does with your children. Without mom it is hard to have fulfilled children. They need mom, and so do we.

I am not one to start something if I wont do it too. So today, I want to ask my beautiful wife Jamie to forgive me for being anything less then your knight in shining armor. Forgive me for putting my needs before yours while you have held our crew together during some very rough times. I want you to know Jamie that you mean the whole world to me and I am saying it in front of the world to see so you know I mean it. Please let me make you feel like the queen you are, the mother you are and the wife you have been. I don’t have enough space on this blog to list the times you were there for me, and the times you emptied your cup for me. I have a full cup ready to fill yours baby and I hope you are ready for some real love because I am making you the first priority in my life now and wanted you to know that you are my everything. I wish I could sing -I would sing the song called Hard To Love- by Lee Brice to you honey. For now just play it and listen to the words.

I hereby proclaim my love for you and our family on this day 07/30/2014.



To all the men out there, maybe you want to make this day the day you start showing your wife your love, not just saying it. I am, so why not? Lets all do it. 

To the ladies out there, maybe you can show your man this post and inspire them. I would love to hear any stories of success from this day of commitment that I am proclaiming over my family. 

God Bless you all-


Author: (Don't Label My Kid! Coaching & Counseling Team)

Social Worker- Mental Health, Addictions, and Behavioral health- Leadership Educator-, Juvenile Justice. A variety of coaching. I have a great desire to help others make it through times that I myself have had to navigate. I understand the process, the pain,and the support needed. I, and the rest of my team all have both the formal education to coach others but more importantly we also have the life experience which allows us to relate to all the phases and hurdles that come with recovering from issues like depression, addiction, domestic violence, spiritual confusion, and much more. I feel that the combination of formal training and life experience allows us to meet those we help every point of need- in a real way.

2 thoughts on “Marriage- Tell Her You Love Her- Then Love Her!”

  1. A great message Tj and one I agree with from a woman’s point of view (see links below) the roles God has given us as Men and Woman are neither Superior or Inferior, both are very needed but can only be fully lived out in His empowering by The Holy Spirit, for a Man and Woman to find each other they need to find Jesus first.

    Woman of Strength-

    Christian Soldiers –

    I added your this Post link to my New Post , thank you for the freedom to do so.

    Christian Love – Anne

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